It's not forever

Robert recently developed a habit: he makes a V with his fingers (like scissors) and runs them across his nose with one finger on the bridge of his nose and one finger across his nostrils. He alternates left and right hands in a few quick swipes. He does it without noticing. He does it often throughout the day...like he just needs something more for his hands to do.

Before developing this quirk, there was a period of time when he would shift his hips in a weird way and grab his bum. I thought he had a wiping problem, but he later informed me that he didn't like how his bum cheeks stuck together. He was trying to separate them.

Before that, it was a snorking sound with his nose.

And the first one I ever remember was this one:

Why do I share this with you? Because I fretted over each quirk as it developed. I completely forgot about the earlier quirks as soon as they disappeared, and suddenly feared that Robert would be stretching his face or separating his bum cheeks for the rest of his life. The truth is, so far, the quirks have come one at a time and only persisted for a short time. Is it something he'll outgrow? It is autism? I have my secret theories, but I don't allow myself to explore them too far because guess what? It's (probably) not forever. This is something I must choose to chill about. I'm just recording it on the blog so I remember better :) And to give y'all a chance to contribute your thoughts.

I say it every time...

...but 18 months begins my favorite stage in my kids' lives (so far). Matthew is changing so fast and in so many directions. His pot belly, for one:

  
He's never had one before. The last two weeks, he's been eating like a pig and sleeping insanely long amounts of time with no interruptions. Now his 12-month shirts don't fit anymore and even some of the 18-month ones are a little short. I'm hoping it's the largest growth spurt of his little life and not some kind of eating disorder...

In other news, he's a total ham. He knows when he's being funny and the kids just laugh and laugh. He plays "the shouting game" with James just about every day:

It cracks me up every time. It's loud, yes. James once tried initiating a round of "the shouting game" with a peer and she replied with a scowl, "When I yell at my house, my mom tells me to be quiet. Be quiet, James." I should probably train them to be less noisy (especially James, holy moley!), but spontaneous moments of (non-destructive) cooperative play are my kryptonite and I can't help but watch them unfold.

I've also seen Matthew imitate some of the kids' wrestling antics, which makes us all laugh. And when he sees things aren't going the way he likes, he'll pout like the big kids: chin down, lips pursed, arms slack at his sides, jerky/slumpy walk with heavy feet. He's a real person!

I. love. this. age.

But he's only 15 months. I'm getting ahead of myself. Or maybe he's picking up on these social cues a little earlier than the other kids did? Anyway, he's a real treat to have around, even if he periodically eats more than his 5-year-old brother. 

Girls' Weekend

Just got back from a weekend in San Antonio with two very good friends. Never having made an escape quite like this, I didn't have ANY expectations.

No, wait.

I expected the fun to be the best part: traveling around, seeing new stuff, playing tourist, joking around with old friends.

And while this trip was fun in all those ways, fun wasn't what made it such a revitalizing, rejuvenating, uplifting experience.

I was amazed by how spiritual and educational it turned out to be. I got to bounce my questions--any questions--to these ladies and they came back with real-life answers. Real testimony. They also asked a lot of questions and I got to examine myself and figure out where I stood and what I knew and what I loved about me and what I wanted to change. I won't remember even a small percentage of what we talked and talked and talked about over those 3-4 days, but I hope to retain some memory of the profound love and respect we share for each other.

I loved how the right empathetic sigh could soothe years of frustration.

I loved sleeping in 'till 7:15, the sunlight streaming in my window.

I loved cooking delicious, interesting food for people who appreciated it and ate it without complaint. Not one stinking complaint.

I loved working with three competent, capable adults to do all the planning and work.

I loved how quiet it could be.

I loved how dinner conversation could last 2 hours and I didn't even notice time passing.

And while we often talked about our kids, we were mostly talking about parenting our kids, which is different, and which I found much more helpful, educational, and spiritual.

Both of these women have a talent for bringing the gospel into almost every discussion. It's beautiful because they never sound preachy...just honest questions/thoughts from people who are working through this life.

An excellent experience.

Now to a few pictures:

Michelle can make me look so confident.

James and preschool...oh yeah.

I waffled a bit, debating whether James and I really needed/wanted preschool to start this semester. He and I get along well. We have routines. It's fine.

*sigh*

But I finally decided that James would benefit from the structure, the social interaction, and the various kinds of play/learning that I don't have energy to manage at home (shaving cream painting? journal writing? songs and finger plays?). Both of us would benefit from a little more independence, too...I had hoped. He's only a couple months younger than Robert was when he started preschool. It's that crazy fall birthday that throws everything off.

Well, today was his second day at preschool and wow!...

No wonder lunch got so quiet all of a sudden...

...it's exhausting. But he LOVES it. He was only the slightest bit uneasy the first day when he was learning the routine. Today, though, he knew exactly what he wanted to do and got to work driving toy cars through shaving cream mountains. Miss Julie tells me he was raising his hand to answer questions during rug time, AND he used the bathroom COMPLETELY alone. Pardon all my capital letters. I'm thrilled with this news because James hasn't "been able" to remove his own shoes or put on his own underpants in the bathroom for weeks. He has slipped into bathroom dependence. 

So, today, my favorite reason to love preschool is the independence factor. I am a better mom when I see how I've been enabling my kids' dependence with my low expectations :) James is such a capable guy!

And I have found those few hours at home with just Matthew to be delicious. So, so, quiet. So much attention for the babe who gets no attention. And he naps for part of it, too. Sweet quiet time for my harried brain.

I will probably miss the kids' noise when it's gone.

I will probably long for the days when they fought over who would sit next to me.

I may even come to forget the rough bits that make me wonder all over again why the heck I'm doing any of this.

Until then, I will take these quiet(er) mornings twice a week and relish them.

Why? Why? WHY?! Because he's a puppy dog, of course.

Hello Again

Hello again. It's been a whirlwind winter vacation from school. Please excuse the glut of photos, but I really can't write it all down in words.

The kids broke out the yarn and created a "spy course" to play in. Red is laser, black is some sort of hot lava stuff that freezes you in place. They spent a considerable amount of time creating it, 2 minutes playing in it, and 2 minutes cleaning it up.

Christmas Eve with the other set of Illinois Evanses. The festivities this year included dinner, a live action re-enactment of Luke 2 (with the spontaneous addition of a little drummer dog), and a hilarious set of minute-to-win-it contests. The kids really got into it. So much fun.

Christmas morning was short, cuz we had to get on the road to Houston. The kids endured the 2-day drive fairly well, thanks to some absolutely critical Christmas gifts from their favorite Aunt Erin. Here's a picture of Robert after he fell asleep mid-cut on his craft project.

Alice read almost the whole way to Houston. She clearly resented having her photo taken. She seems to feel that way a lot, recently. And she's no longer cool with getting up in front of people. Or meeting new people. Or being the center of attention in a mixed group of friends and strangers. She says it's embarrassing. Ack! My star performer has gone! Now she's even horrified to give a small talk in front of her church class. What happened?! She's the same crazy, energetic, and loud performer she's always been, but now that side of her is reserved exclusively for close friends and family (we got another round of "The Annoying Kids Show" for New Years Eve). I don't like how she's becoming more like me this way ;)

Selfie interrupted by James' candy cane.

I got to sit between this handsome man and his little brother all four days in the car.

After a long, grueling day in the car, we stopped at the Days Inn in Graceland. It was...um...scary. And dirty. The above friendly reminders came with our key card. Bobby encountered a man peeing in the parking lot who later requested the use of his phone. Bobby declined. We didn't even stay long enough to get a picture of the guitar-shaped pool.

When his joyous bag of candy from Erin ran out, James found his water bottle to be a refreshing new entertainment.

Finally in Houston at my mom's house! Cousins rock. Really, really rock.

Seriously, cousins are the BEST.

Matthew discovered a new facial expression. It goes with a piggy noise, too. Crazy cute kid.

James somehow managed to get his finger stuck in my dad's ladder. A little spray of Pam got him out.

Robert lost his first tooth! It was sooooooo wiggly/floppy, that I worried he might swallow it in the night. Fortunately, he just woke up the next morning, opened his mouth, and it plopped out onto his blanket. The new tooth had already broken through the gums behind the baby tooth. Robert's teeth are considerably closer together than Alice or James' are. It already looks kinda crowded in there. Erk.

Welcoming in 2016! We played games, ate tons of treats, and watched way too many episodes of America's Funniest Home Videos. Alice laughed SO hard. At midnight, we went outside to blow horns and shoot confetti poppers. Robert is clutching a shirt full of gathered streamers to his chest.

If I ever travel with young kids in the car again, I must remember to bring balloons. Lots of balloons. This boy played with one balloon for 30 minutes. I kid you not.

We also had plenty of audio books to stimulate young minds. "Alice in Wonderland" wasn't very popular. "Soup" was alright, but kinda mature for this group. "James and the Giant Peach" was spot-on for Alice and Robert (I started them on Chapter 9 where James discovers a hole in the peach...skip all that nasty Sponge and Spiker business). 

Froot Loop necklaces entertained them a good hour.

Finally home again! The babe developed this funky bout of diarrhea that doesn't bother him in the slightest except it burns his bum all red. We've been keeping him mostly naked so we can detect dirty diapers quickly and clean him up immediately.

Within seconds of returning home, we were pulling into our driveway, and Alice asked if she could go across the street to play with the neighbor. Seriously?! She just spent 7 hours in the company of 5 other people and she needs MORE?! Alice is still an extrovert. Clearly.