Sorry I skipped last week. Life is slowly reaching a new normal. Susan's mom gone, and most of the meals and help from others has either stopped or is tapering off. We also have started to go out in public again as a family, including at least some of Church today. We also went out to Curtis Orchid yesterday for a fun family outing. Originally we wanted to go to a pumpkin patch that is close by, but that had sold out already and closed for the year. It was still a lot of fun. We are all doing OK but very tired.
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
3 weeks post-partum
Informal bathroom scale measurements put James at just about 11 pounds this afternoon. That's about 90th percentile for baby boys his age. I can literally see his fingers getting fatter every day.
He's still a generally pleasant baby: calm when he's awake, eating every 2-3 hours day and night, and generally content as long as he's part of the action and moved frequently. He doesn't generally sleep much during the day, though. Maybe 10-minute naps here and there. He'll pass out, then wake up for a series of unproductive grunts and straining, followed by a brief cry for attention. Then when I pick him up, he's awake and cheerful and seemingly well-rested.
Nights are decent. He seems to pass out pretty quickly after each feeding, except when I eat something offensive to his gut. Last night was one of those nights. He ate every 4 hours, but took an hour of grunting and straining and fussing before settling back to sleep each time. Ugh.
The best news is, though, that my pain is almost completely gone. If I don't do too much physically, and as long as people are helping with meals and occasional childcare, I think we've reached our first fragile equilibrium. It's a good place to be right now: Robert is returning to his normal self and I'm finding new coping strategies for James' needs and my needs. It's fragile. Any new illness or change in the kids will upset what we have right now *sigh*. I've been a handwashing freak all week. If you sniff a little too loud or too often, I'm keeping my distance from you and keeping track of everything you've touched. Argh! That's part of my sleep deprivation craziness. Please don't take it personally.
Things will change, dang it, and I know that. I'm just trying to enjoy the relative rhythm we've just barely found.
Robert and James seem to be resting right now, so I'm off to lie down, too.
He's still a generally pleasant baby: calm when he's awake, eating every 2-3 hours day and night, and generally content as long as he's part of the action and moved frequently. He doesn't generally sleep much during the day, though. Maybe 10-minute naps here and there. He'll pass out, then wake up for a series of unproductive grunts and straining, followed by a brief cry for attention. Then when I pick him up, he's awake and cheerful and seemingly well-rested.
Nights are decent. He seems to pass out pretty quickly after each feeding, except when I eat something offensive to his gut. Last night was one of those nights. He ate every 4 hours, but took an hour of grunting and straining and fussing before settling back to sleep each time. Ugh.
The best news is, though, that my pain is almost completely gone. If I don't do too much physically, and as long as people are helping with meals and occasional childcare, I think we've reached our first fragile equilibrium. It's a good place to be right now: Robert is returning to his normal self and I'm finding new coping strategies for James' needs and my needs. It's fragile. Any new illness or change in the kids will upset what we have right now *sigh*. I've been a handwashing freak all week. If you sniff a little too loud or too often, I'm keeping my distance from you and keeping track of everything you've touched. Argh! That's part of my sleep deprivation craziness. Please don't take it personally.
Things will change, dang it, and I know that. I'm just trying to enjoy the relative rhythm we've just barely found.
Robert and James seem to be resting right now, so I'm off to lie down, too.
Friday, October 19, 2012
James Upgrade
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, he's cordless! More portable than ever and quite the functional accessory for every new mom on the go. Now we can bathe him properly and dress him in full outfits. Huzzah. He's fattening up nicely, too, starting to look less red and more pinkish. Alice actually went so far today as to call him chubby. And for your "way too much information" pleasure, I've snapped picts of all three kids' belly buttons (presented in semi-random order to protect their privacy...um, if that's even possible when your bellybutton is now posted on the internet). My grandmother wouldn't even say the word bellybutton and here I am *sigh*. I did warn you that I go a little crazy when I'm sleep-deprived, right? James' button should be the easiest to spot.
My mom went home today. And since I managed to type that without crying, I must be doing better. It's been a much harder physical recovery for me this time around and we REALLY needed her every second she was here. I will need to let some time pass before going into any further details. It's been a raw couple of weeks. Getting out of bed this morning was an act of faith.
Bobby worked from home today mostly for emotional support. I didn't know if I could do it on my own. I still don't know how the next week will go exactly, but today went okay. The kids seemed extra nice to each other for some reason and James was quietly happy and awake most of the afternoon as long as someone was holding him up. My mom was probably praying for us all day ;) Thanks, Mom.
Here are a few more pictures. I still can't decide who he looks like most.
Sunday, October 14, 2012
Bobby's Sunday Summary
This week has been quite the experience. Everyone was doing well until about Tuesday :). At least as well as we could expect with a new baby. Then the sickness started. Everyone in our family, except for James, has had their day or so to get sulfur burps, feeling nauseous and miserable. It made the kids throw up. After that it seems to go away, but it also kind of lingers. Robert has had a few relapses of throwing up. One of them was right on top of Susan. I think we are past the worst of it though.
Saturday, October 13, 2012
My Tummy Hurts
Please forgive me if you've come in contact with any members of my family since Tuesday. We've contracted some kind of barfing sickness. Buddy started us off on Wednesday, then seemed normal on Thursday, then he and Alice both threw up on Friday (we did get her home from school before her episode, though). I got nauseous last night and both Bobby and I have been out of commission all day today. Bobby even passed out after 2 sips of water this afternoon. Not pretty, folks. I'm sooooooo glad my mom is here to take care of all of us. She seems unaffected so far. Baby James is still behaving within normal limits, too. My earnest prayer is that he will remain healthy. Please oh please oh please.
The kids are pretty much back to normal after a day on the couch. It seems to be a short-lived bug. You won't be seeing any of us at church tomorrow, regardless. We're in quarantine.
And just for fun, here's a short clip of the kids gutting a pumpkin. Alice's class went to a pumpkin farm this week and she couldn't wait to get carving...and bossing Buddy around *sigh*:
Friday, October 12, 2012
The Nitty Gritty
We're just starting to settle in with our new baby James. It's been a week. I'm hurting a little less and growing accustomed to the interrupted sleep a little more and that's a pretty good place to be right now.
His full name is James Thomas Evans. He weighed in at 8lbs 8oz (more than a little shy of the 9lb estimate given by the midwife earlier that day), and the nurse measured him at a lengthy 21 inches, though he seemed to have lost 2 inches by the time we saw the doctor on day 3. Hmmmm.
Now to the nitty gritty. Late Tuesday night, Robert woke up crying in a puddle of his own urine. Bobby got up to take care of him and I rolled over to go back to sleep. Then it happened. The unmistakeable "pop" and "twang" sensation that is strangely audible in the middle of the night: my water breaking. I didn't move. I pretended I was mistaken. There was no gush, so maybe it was just a strange dream. Right? Right?! As much as I wanted this baby born, I was not ready for him right now. Not tonight. One more night of sleep, please? Nope. I looked at the clock: 11:22 PM. Contractions started soon afterwards and I knew the day had come. I let Bobby fall asleep again after dealing with Robert...the contractions weren't painful and they were 10 minutes apart, so why worry the man with the news just yet? I was a trembling heap. Not cold, but shivering uncontrollably. This was SO different from the two times before. Finally, I had three contractions that were 8 minutes apart and I told Bobby. He got to work right away dressing and assembling our hospital gear. We called our neighbor to stay with the kids, called the Labor and Delivery floor to tell them we were on our way, and got on the road.
I felt a little silly going to the hospital so early in the process, but knew it was our best shot at getting the recommended dose of IV antibiotics for the Group B strep. Those irrepressible shakes were a little unnerving, too. We arrived soon after midnight. I had dilated to 3 cm. Not much, but noticeably painful now. There was meconium in the amniotic fluid. That was a first for me, too. It meant the baby was under some stress and there would have to be a team of NICU nurses at the delivery to clear out his airways and look for signs of meconium aspiration syndrome as soon as he was born. I started to worry.
We filled out paperwork, got hooked up to the fetal monitor and such, they took my vitals, and the IV went in about 1:30 AM. The contractions got stronger. The shakes got worse. At the peak of the contractions, I felt like throwing up. This was nothing like before. I was terrified. I could ride through the pain with stoic reserve, but inside my mind I was a wreck of fear and tension. This was not going well. They asked me about pain control measures. I considered my options again. I remembered Robert's birth and wondered if even a botched epidural could feel any worse than the searing pain and traumatic fear in my near future. The nurse said, "Honey, I gave birth to my first two naturally and had an epidural with the third. There's no gold star, and you get to take home a baby no matter what."
No gold star? You got that straight.
Okay. Do it.
Turns out, this anesthesiologist knew what she was doing and my spinal cord was cooperative. No botch. Sweet, warm, numbness. The shivers and nausea continued with each contraction, but the pain and fear disappeared. It was a completely different experience. I was more comfortable at that moment than I had been in the last 6 weeks. No joke. It felt criminal. I almost cried tears of joy. There were a couple things I didn't like about the epidural experience, though:
1) the numbness started just below my diaphragm. It was a little odd breathing without feeling my abdominal muscles move. It felt like I might stop breathing any minute.
2) everything from my diaphragm down was warm lead. I couldn't move it. I couldn't feel it. I needed help to sit up, even an hour after the epidural was removed. People moved my legs for me and it was surreal.
But (and this is a BIG but), I was comfortable. Completely comfortable. Would I do it again? Yes.
When James was born, the umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck and his belly. He cried spontaneously just as the midwife handed him to the NICU nurses for the aspiration treatment. I didn't get to hold James at first, partially because of the meconium thing and partially because of the epidural numbness thing. I just didn't feel confident I could hold him safely when I couldn't even sit up straight on my own. The midwives worked on a few stitches and Bobby held our crying baby. I lay on the bed feeling helpless and displaced until I finally got to hold James. Then I was okay.
So, my water broke at 11:22 PM and James was born at 4:00 AM. That's a 4.5-hour delivery. Only 2.5 hours of antibiotics (they recommend 4), but it was enough to calm my fears and the on-call pediatrician trusted us to complete the "48-hour observation" period at home.
Recovery since then has been slow, but progressive. Pain-free nursing is still a work in progress. I'm forcing myself to rest more this time around. And I finally learned that "rest" includes lying on the couch with my eyes closed, even if I have no hope of actually falling asleep. Even if it's only for ten minutes. It counts, and I'm refreshed, and I'm not stressed out about losing hours of "real" sleep anymore.
James has made it pretty easy on us so far. His internal clock has been set to 2-3 hours from day one. He's been eating aggressively, efficiently, and promptly falling asleep again. My newborn experience with Alice and Robert required hours of soothing and holding between short, irregular periods of feeding and fussiness. I would like to think that this difference in James has something to do with me cutting out dairy foods a month ago, but Alice and Robert were never this regular even on a zero-dairy diet. I think this kid is just plain different. That's okay with me :)
How much more do you want to know? My milk came in after 2 days (successive pregnancies speed up the process) and James regained his birth weight in 5 days (the average is 10 days). We checked in at the breastfeeding clinic when he was 2 days old and 5 days old. He took in 1.5-2 oz of milk at both feedings, which is twice the usual rate for an infant that age. We may have another chunker on our hands, or he may just be taking advantage of the early milk supply.
I did detect a new roll on his thighs this morning. Mwah ha ha haaaaaa. Grow big and fat, dear baby James. You'll need every advantage in the wrestling ring with Robert.
His full name is James Thomas Evans. He weighed in at 8lbs 8oz (more than a little shy of the 9lb estimate given by the midwife earlier that day), and the nurse measured him at a lengthy 21 inches, though he seemed to have lost 2 inches by the time we saw the doctor on day 3. Hmmmm.
Now to the nitty gritty. Late Tuesday night, Robert woke up crying in a puddle of his own urine. Bobby got up to take care of him and I rolled over to go back to sleep. Then it happened. The unmistakeable "pop" and "twang" sensation that is strangely audible in the middle of the night: my water breaking. I didn't move. I pretended I was mistaken. There was no gush, so maybe it was just a strange dream. Right? Right?! As much as I wanted this baby born, I was not ready for him right now. Not tonight. One more night of sleep, please? Nope. I looked at the clock: 11:22 PM. Contractions started soon afterwards and I knew the day had come. I let Bobby fall asleep again after dealing with Robert...the contractions weren't painful and they were 10 minutes apart, so why worry the man with the news just yet? I was a trembling heap. Not cold, but shivering uncontrollably. This was SO different from the two times before. Finally, I had three contractions that were 8 minutes apart and I told Bobby. He got to work right away dressing and assembling our hospital gear. We called our neighbor to stay with the kids, called the Labor and Delivery floor to tell them we were on our way, and got on the road.
I felt a little silly going to the hospital so early in the process, but knew it was our best shot at getting the recommended dose of IV antibiotics for the Group B strep. Those irrepressible shakes were a little unnerving, too. We arrived soon after midnight. I had dilated to 3 cm. Not much, but noticeably painful now. There was meconium in the amniotic fluid. That was a first for me, too. It meant the baby was under some stress and there would have to be a team of NICU nurses at the delivery to clear out his airways and look for signs of meconium aspiration syndrome as soon as he was born. I started to worry.
We filled out paperwork, got hooked up to the fetal monitor and such, they took my vitals, and the IV went in about 1:30 AM. The contractions got stronger. The shakes got worse. At the peak of the contractions, I felt like throwing up. This was nothing like before. I was terrified. I could ride through the pain with stoic reserve, but inside my mind I was a wreck of fear and tension. This was not going well. They asked me about pain control measures. I considered my options again. I remembered Robert's birth and wondered if even a botched epidural could feel any worse than the searing pain and traumatic fear in my near future. The nurse said, "Honey, I gave birth to my first two naturally and had an epidural with the third. There's no gold star, and you get to take home a baby no matter what."
No gold star? You got that straight.
Okay. Do it.
Turns out, this anesthesiologist knew what she was doing and my spinal cord was cooperative. No botch. Sweet, warm, numbness. The shivers and nausea continued with each contraction, but the pain and fear disappeared. It was a completely different experience. I was more comfortable at that moment than I had been in the last 6 weeks. No joke. It felt criminal. I almost cried tears of joy. There were a couple things I didn't like about the epidural experience, though:
1) the numbness started just below my diaphragm. It was a little odd breathing without feeling my abdominal muscles move. It felt like I might stop breathing any minute.
2) everything from my diaphragm down was warm lead. I couldn't move it. I couldn't feel it. I needed help to sit up, even an hour after the epidural was removed. People moved my legs for me and it was surreal.
But (and this is a BIG but), I was comfortable. Completely comfortable. Would I do it again? Yes.
When James was born, the umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck and his belly. He cried spontaneously just as the midwife handed him to the NICU nurses for the aspiration treatment. I didn't get to hold James at first, partially because of the meconium thing and partially because of the epidural numbness thing. I just didn't feel confident I could hold him safely when I couldn't even sit up straight on my own. The midwives worked on a few stitches and Bobby held our crying baby. I lay on the bed feeling helpless and displaced until I finally got to hold James. Then I was okay.
So, my water broke at 11:22 PM and James was born at 4:00 AM. That's a 4.5-hour delivery. Only 2.5 hours of antibiotics (they recommend 4), but it was enough to calm my fears and the on-call pediatrician trusted us to complete the "48-hour observation" period at home.
Recovery since then has been slow, but progressive. Pain-free nursing is still a work in progress. I'm forcing myself to rest more this time around. And I finally learned that "rest" includes lying on the couch with my eyes closed, even if I have no hope of actually falling asleep. Even if it's only for ten minutes. It counts, and I'm refreshed, and I'm not stressed out about losing hours of "real" sleep anymore.
James has made it pretty easy on us so far. His internal clock has been set to 2-3 hours from day one. He's been eating aggressively, efficiently, and promptly falling asleep again. My newborn experience with Alice and Robert required hours of soothing and holding between short, irregular periods of feeding and fussiness. I would like to think that this difference in James has something to do with me cutting out dairy foods a month ago, but Alice and Robert were never this regular even on a zero-dairy diet. I think this kid is just plain different. That's okay with me :)
 |
| Furrowed brow. One of James' favorite looks. |
 |
| My mom and Buddy picking strawberries. A bumper fall crop! |
 |
| Asleep James, looking a little yellow/orange from the residual jaundice |
I did detect a new roll on his thighs this morning. Mwah ha ha haaaaaa. Grow big and fat, dear baby James. You'll need every advantage in the wrestling ring with Robert.
Sunday, October 7, 2012
Bobby's Sunday Summary
This week has been a bit crazy. As you all know we now have a new member of our family. Susan's mom is in town so life is getting better, but we are all still very tired. More pictures and moview should be coming soon.
Thursday, October 4, 2012
More of James
James and I came home this afternoon, much to everyone's relief and joy (especially Alice). He's a champion nurser, but hasn't managed to poop into a diaper yet (plenty of meconium in the amniotic fluid, though). I'll share the nitty-gritty birth story details later :) For now, I'll just share pictures and movies of this sweet little man who is content to eat, sleep, and hang out in a state of quiet alertness. The kids still call him Bogah.
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Midwife visit 40-ish weeks
I met with Kathy Easter today. She's one of my favorite midwives at Carle. She didn't find much significant progress towards labor during the physical exam, but she's less picky than Ray, who I saw last week, and she said it was all she could do to keep from secretly stripping my membranes during the exam. Membrane stripping is a little trick that can start labor in many women within 12-36 hours. As much as I want this baby to come soon, today seemed TOO soon. Yes, I'm crazy.
The boy is still growing. Kathy says she makes it a matter of principle never to tell an expectant mom anything more than "high eights", but nine pounds wouldn't be out of the question for this fellow this week. His heart rate is great and he's still moving around a lot. I chatted with her for a long time about the induction scenario and all of my concerns. I say that I want an induction, and that it makes sense in many ways, but I just can't bring myself to officially say "yes" to a medically unnecessary procedure with so many potential risks. I just don't feel completely right about it. I am feeling, however, a lot of pressure to choose the induction route. Mostly from myself and the planner in me. But the closer we get to my "real" due date, the less and less it matters to me when the baby actually comes. He will come. He will come soon. No matter when he arrives, he will probably be here sooner and later than I'm ready for him. Whether it's in one day or three days or five, does it really matter? Because it's not gonna be much longer than that, no matter what.
Sooooooo, here's my new plan. According to the due date they assigned me, this Friday (Oct 5th) will be 41 weeks. That's when they would normally schedule a non-stress test and an ultrasound to check for fluid levels around the baby. That's also the day my mom arrives (huzzah!), we start a 3-day weekend from school (Columbus Day), and conference weekend begins (no extra Sunday meetings for Bobby to attend or conduct). If the baby doesn't come before Friday, we'll run through the prescribed tests to check for any medical reasons to schedule an induction. If all looks good, no medical concerns, we'll strip my membranes and see if the baby comes on his own over the weekend when my mom can seamlessly take the kids and we don't have a million places to be and specific times to be there. It's unexpectedly ideal.
If stripping doesn't help, we'll move to the next phase next week.
And I hope to be over this chest cold by Friday so I'm in better shape to take care of baby Bogah Behemoth when he does actually arrive ;)
The boy is still growing. Kathy says she makes it a matter of principle never to tell an expectant mom anything more than "high eights", but nine pounds wouldn't be out of the question for this fellow this week. His heart rate is great and he's still moving around a lot. I chatted with her for a long time about the induction scenario and all of my concerns. I say that I want an induction, and that it makes sense in many ways, but I just can't bring myself to officially say "yes" to a medically unnecessary procedure with so many potential risks. I just don't feel completely right about it. I am feeling, however, a lot of pressure to choose the induction route. Mostly from myself and the planner in me. But the closer we get to my "real" due date, the less and less it matters to me when the baby actually comes. He will come. He will come soon. No matter when he arrives, he will probably be here sooner and later than I'm ready for him. Whether it's in one day or three days or five, does it really matter? Because it's not gonna be much longer than that, no matter what.
Sooooooo, here's my new plan. According to the due date they assigned me, this Friday (Oct 5th) will be 41 weeks. That's when they would normally schedule a non-stress test and an ultrasound to check for fluid levels around the baby. That's also the day my mom arrives (huzzah!), we start a 3-day weekend from school (Columbus Day), and conference weekend begins (no extra Sunday meetings for Bobby to attend or conduct). If the baby doesn't come before Friday, we'll run through the prescribed tests to check for any medical reasons to schedule an induction. If all looks good, no medical concerns, we'll strip my membranes and see if the baby comes on his own over the weekend when my mom can seamlessly take the kids and we don't have a million places to be and specific times to be there. It's unexpectedly ideal.
If stripping doesn't help, we'll move to the next phase next week.
And I hope to be over this chest cold by Friday so I'm in better shape to take care of baby Bogah Behemoth when he does actually arrive ;)
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