Bobby's memorial day summary

Sorry I did not write yesterday. It was a very busy day. I had home teaching and we had some friends from out of town come over for dinner. It was a lot of fun. We had Julia over, one of Susan's friends from college and also some friends that used to live just through the block from us about 3 years ago. They have kids just a bit older then both Robert and Alice. So Alice had lots of fun playing with "new" old friends again, and Robert got to play with someone new. He actually played with them, which is a bit of a first. Susan also got to play with her friends too.

This past week was kind of busy anyways. Alice had a preschool commencement ceremony, but I did not get to go, because Robert was feeling sick that day. He has actually been sick quite a bit recently. He had a fever at the end of last week and the beginning of this week. Then yesterday he work up with a rash all over. I think it was something he ate, but we don't know for sure. The rash was mostly gone this morning, so we will probably never know for sure what happened, but he will not be eating any more fresh pineapple for a while.

House Nibble

Someone wants to make us an offer on our house. They haven't done it yet, but they say they want to.

Why on earth does this bother me?

A few of the thoughts rattling around upstairs:

"Hey, you can't take my life, er, I mean, house!"
"Oh thank goodness!"
"Wait a minute, I was just getting to like this arrangement."
"So much can go wrong between now and closing. Don't get excited."
"I'm so excited."
"Where the heck are we going to move?!"
"Why do they want this house? What do they see that I'm not seeing?"
"Yippee! Does this mean I can let the housework go? No more showings?"
"Where am I going to fit in house hunting?"
"Aw crap, now I might actually have to move."
"I don't want to leave my friends."
"Curses."
"What. Have. We. Done?!"

I suppose my mixed feelings come from our mixed motivation to sell. You see, we're not going TO anything. If there were another job or a graduation that had propelled us to a new location, then we would be going TOWARD something. As it is, we're just LEAVING some things and trying to keep everything else the same. Strange feeling. Irritating to my planner-personality. It's soothing to look over possible homes, though. I've been avoiding the official "search for a new home" thing because it feels like we're SO far away from selling this one...why spin my wheels for nothing? But maybe it is time...for my own sanity, at least...to envision something we're moving towards. Otherwise, I might not want to leave this house. Ever.

But I do. Sort of?

New Neighbor Friends

Yesterday, Alice struck up a friendship with two kids whose backyard is "kitty corner" to ours, Y and B. The three of them suddenly, somehow, got the idea to start giving each other toys. Alice isn't strong/practiced enough to throw her gifts into their yard, so Y has to climb over a different neighbor's fence to get them. I took this movie from inside the house, holding Robert, who manages to point out a few birds while I'm recording. Why did I take it? I don't really know. I just found it fascinating. This exact toy exchange took place after several other exchanges and you can see their mom come to the back door to ask what they're doing. You can tell that Y knows he's not supposed to be hopping the fence...so many quick glances back towards the house:

A couple exchanges after this one, their mom decides it's enough. I think it's Y's fence-hopping that got him into trouble, but it's hard to tell across the language/culture differences. Their mom only told Alice, "Not today, please." I have mixed feelings about this activity. They exchanged items again this evening. The kids are all obviously excited about the "new" toys, I've only let Alice give away toys that are truly hers to give, and yet I wish she wouldn't do it. Among other things, we are now the proud owners of half a dozen Happy Meal toys that Alice carts around in a dirty Tinkerbell backpack. Erk.

Bobby's Sunday Summary

Well, This week has seemed kind of calm, which is good. Robert and Alice went to the doctor on Monday. It turned out OK, especially wen ALice learned that she would not need any shots. Robert, however, did need shots. He seamed to react fairly well, but on Saturday he developed a fever. We kind of think it may have been a reaction to the shots, but just to be sure we did not let him go out much. I stayed home with Robert while Susan and Alice went to a ward activity on Saturday night. Today Susan stayed home with Robert during church, and I stayed with the kids while Susan went to a later Sacrament meeting. This is the first time that we have had a sick child since I was called into the Bishopric. We had to think things through to know how I could still be on the stand and also let Alice go to church. We are very lucky with how obedient Alice is.

But this week was not all about Robert. Alice got to go on a field trip to the Nature center. She got to see snakes and turtles. She also found several mosquitoes, or perhaps more appropriately they found her.

Alice's First Babysitting Gig

She did a lovely job! Violet is one month younger than Robert and one of the easiest "babies" I've ever watched, but that's only because of Alice. Alice offered her toys, showed her how to do things, and generally talked/sang/played with her the entire time. I just sat in the same room, nearby-ish, and monitored the play. Violet tolerated Alice's overly affectionate mothering very well and even let her hold her for a little snack at the end. What a fun little afternoon!

 

Bob, Bob, Baby Bob

The boy of a thousand names: Robert, Bob, Baby Bob, Buddy, Bud, Buddy boy, Boy, Buddy boo, Boo, Mister, Mister blister, Goofy guy, Boy-o, Silly billy, Little Bobby, Roberto, and sometimes Rob when Alice feels like it. He seems to respond to all of them, which makes me think it's my tone, not my words, that gets his attention.

  

(I love how he took a bite out of each cracker before finishing any of them)

Robert is a watchful fellow, aware of subtleties in communication and relationships. That pleases me to no end and I can't pinpoint why.

I smile gleefully and rub my hands together (in my mind, of course) every time I see him figure something out on his own. He's been doing a lot of figuring lately. Alice was making a paper crown at the kitchen table the other day. Robert pushed a chair right next to her and tried to climb up on it. I was astonished. Learning how to use a fork is one thing, but planning and carrying out a strategy to play with the markers is an entirely different story. He's only one! Another day, we had some friends over and I offered them some homemade popsicles (fruit juice in an ice cube tray). There weren't enough popsicles for Robert to have one. Robert was occupied with a snack in his chair so I thought he wouldn't notice. The second he saw the ice cube tray heading for the sink, he freaked! He was asking for his popsicle and I sheepishly had to admit that there was none. That made him even more mad. Poor guy. Lesson learned, though. Robert watches carefully and he always wants a piece of the action. Especially popsicle action.

He's so goofy! All he has to do is grin that squinty, open-mouthed sigh of his and we all bust up laughing. Sometimes it comes out of nowhere, especially at dinner. When he's in a playful mood, he'll tackle one of us with an open mouth. Alice loves it and will wrestle him on the floor until they're both tired and slobbery. 

  

Robert is more fun than he's ever been. He's just a wonder to watch. He's recently begun asserting himself as an equal to Alice, which gives us lots of practice sharing and taking turns. Stools are a hot item around here. The rules are "no snatching toys" and "everyone gets a turn with non-special toys." Robert will want something Alice is playing with and she'll suddenly clutch it to her chest and freak out. I've discovered that validation goes a long way with Alice. I address Robert and let him know that it's Alice's turn right now and he can have a turn when Alice is done. Three times out of four, Alice will happily hand the toy to Robert within a few seconds, "Here, Robert, it's your turn." One time out of four, Alice wants to play with it longer and I devise other distractions for him.

Anyway, he's an interesting character. A new personality in the Evans household. He's sick today with a fever (his check-up immunizations appear to be functioning) and currently taking a nap, so that's why I can blog about him to my heart's content.  Bobby and Alice are at church. Maybe I'll take a quick rest, too :)

Check-ups

I finally got around to taking Alice and Robert to the doctor for their check-ups. Robert got 3 shots, Alice got none. She'll get 2 next time when I'm not lugging/restraining/wrestling dear little Robert. This was a strange check-up. Alice still hates the mechanized blood pressure cuff (she gripped me with octopus limbs and buried her face in my chest, shrieking, pleading, and sobbing for mercy while Robert just hung out in his diaper watching the craziness unfold), but she had no problem with the old-fashioned stethoscope and hand bulb method. Good to know that for next time.

Alice passed the hearing and vision screenings, but that's entirely uninformative because the medical assistant practically walked Alice through each "correct" answer. Grrrrrrr, I hate that. She not doing ANYONE any favors. Argh. Alice didn't like the hospital gown, and certainly didn't like the doctor until she learned that there would be no shots that day. Then she wouldn't stop talking. Dr. Beck concluded that Alice was a bright child with well-developed language skills. When she heard that Alice could sound out letters and count to 39, she even recommended a few private schools for gifted programs. Honestly, I laughed out loud. Alice knows these things because we work on them, not because she's gifted, and I'm saving that $12,000 a year price tag for undergraduate work. Yeah.

Alice is 50th percentile for height and 75th percentile for weight, just like she's always been. It's strange to have a 40-pound, 41-inch, 4-year-old. Lots of 4's. Lots of personality. Lots to say to anyone who makes eye contact with her. She'll talk about anything. Dr. Beck heard about her new sandals tripping her at the library, her naughty friend Nadia at preschool, the craft we did the other day, Robert's breakfast, and something from a story we read last week. 

Robert entertained himself during Alice's exam by squirming in my lap, climbing on stools, pointing at magazine racks, and perfecting his stink-bug crawl (hands and feet flat on the ground, butt in the air). He got faster and faster with each attempt, working himself up to a sweaty giggle. I think there was a pacifier involved, too. I chickened out and brought it along...no telling how two kids are going to fare in a long dual-check-up, y'know? Alice left the room when it was time for Robert's shots. Sensitive girl. Robert got kicking mad during the third shot, and belted out angry, throaty screams that seemed a bit mature for such a little guy. He angrily ripped off those Snoopy bandages as soon as he could see straight again. He's got a temper, this one. While Alice was in the hallway waiting for Robert to calm down, a nurse came by and gave her a heap of Disney princess stickers. Alice decided to share her stickers with Robert since he didn't get any. She judiciously stuck them on his back so he wouldn't rip them off *sigh*

Robert is growing well. He's 75th percentile for length and 90th percentile for weight. Though only 13 months old, Dr. Beck tells me he doesn't need whole milk anymore. Ha ha ha! Yeah right. I will work on his vegetable intake, though. I've been gettin' lazy in that arena. His noggin is 50th percentile, which is neither here nor there, but it makes his body look even larger in comparison. His first set of molars is in. He's slowly transitioning himself to one nap instead of two.

While Dr. Beck had Robert on the exam table, Alice was climbing all around and playing with him. She was right in his face giving kisses and stroking his cheeks. He loved it. Dr. Beck worked around it. As much as I haven't enjoyed Dr. Beck in the past, I think she's getting better as Alice gets older. Maybe she just does better with preschoolers and elementary age kids? I dunno.

I thought it was a pretty decent experience. I wonder, however, what Dr. Beck's impression was of the whole fiasco. Neither one of the kids sat still at any point during either of the exams. Both were climbing and talking, vocalizing for attention from me. Both were screaming at the top of their lungs at some point. Was I the picture of a harried housewife? I can't remember what I was wearing or even if I had brushed my hair that morning. Now that Alice is wont to spout details of her life at random times to random people, what will those details sound like out of context? I suddenly find myself concerned about the impression I'm giving people as a woman and as a mother. Will they hear her and look at me and know that everything is okay? Or will they worry for her?

I've thought a lot about outward appearances lately with all this house selling stuff. People get a feel for our home and family in just a few minutes. That impression is important. Paramount! I never used to care. Now I want to sell our home, but I still don't want to care what other people think about it. It's a confusing place to be. I've put a lot of work into "keeping up appearances" lately. That's not usually something I do, or value, but I love the way "keeping up appearances" for a house sale gives me the permission I need to finally make things beautiful. Working on appearances has shown me that I actually care about appearances, a little, which honestly surprises me. And it's not just the house anymore. It's me. It's my kids. Suddenly, I wonder what the doctor thinks. I second-guess myself and my parenting choices because they might not give that perfect stranger a good impression. It's not a fun place to be right now. The hope is that it's temporary, though. Once that key box leaves my front door and my home is my own again, I'm pulling all the "me" back out of the closets. Maybe I can keep up the new bits of "me" that this experience has revealed (i.e. flowers in landscaping, girl clothes, etc.) and drop all the new insecurities :)

Bobby's Sunday Summary

Well, Surprise Surprise, not too much happened this week. We went to the temple this week. On the way back we saw 4 accidents one right after another on 270 leaving St. Louis. It took us 1 hour to get past them all. he worst of them they actually routed us off of the freeway for a while. I was raining, but not that bad. I really had to wonder how so many people independently all got in accidents on the same small stretch of road. Luckily Alice and Robert were relatively good through most of it, except for that part about her needing to use the bathroom the entire hour we are trying to get to a gas station to stop. And then just as we pull off the freeway to go the the gas station she falls asleep. The funniest part of it is that she warned Susan that she was going to take a small rest first. Susan thought she was kidding, but it took us several minutes to wake her from the deep sleep once we stopped. Everyone was really tired.

First Swim of the Season

Experiencing a bit of a heat wave last week, Alice asks if we can "finally" swim. She has asked about swimming since the sun peeked out again in March. Well, I don't know how long it will be before the plumber arrives*, so I fill the kiddie pool with freezing cold hose water with the intent to leave it in the sun to warm up for a swim later that afternoon (I learned that trick from my sis-in-law...brilliant!). The kids apparently can't wait that long. Alice pops into her swimsuit and Robert just pops in:

 

Robert doesn't mind the cold water as much as he does the slathering of sunscreen. Alice doesn't get in deeper than her ankles. Robert plays with cups while Alice plays her imaginary games all over the place. The funniest thing is that even though they are playing completely different games in completely different ways, neither one wants to be in the pool without the other. I sit on the back porch and fold laundry while they play away. I watch the beginnings of a sibling relationship and it makes me smile. Here's a 45-second clip of their side-by-side play:

 

*The plumber took 3 hours, by the way. Glad I wasn't holding my breath. Turns out the procedure they had scheduled a week ago to perform that day was no longer allowed by their insurance as of...a week ago! Why they made me wait three hours on the day just to have the guy tell me at my front door that he couldn't do anything, I'll never know...or appreciate ;)  But hey! The kids got to swim. That's one thing they can do this summer while I'm mucking about in the garden. Here's another delightful idea I'm itching to try, too. Maybe this week.

Mother's Day Performance

Last week, Alice happily chirps that she will be performing a song with the Primary during Sacrament Meeting for Mother's Day next week. She's thrilled at the prospect of being "on stage" for the first time ever. She tells me she might be shy in front of everyone. She giggles and whispers that she might point to Daddy instead of me at the end of the song. She tells me that her hair must be "beauty."

Alice wakes up this morning and I remind her of her upcoming performance. Her jaw literally drops and she hops to it. Frustrated that the only puffy-sleeved dress is a costume (and therefore inappropriate for church attire), and that her only puffy-sleeved shirt was mysteriously dirtied the day before by a spontaneous frolic in the rain, she collapses in a despairing heap. How on earth can she be fancy enough for a performance without puffy sleeves?! I rummage through her shirt drawer and find a salmon-colored top that has gathered cap sleeves...close enough, she decides. I lay out the matching (and not-so-matching-but-still-passable) skirts and she declines them all. Even the frilly, fancy, sparkly ones! No, she knows today is a very special day and that requires something extra...more color! I chat with her briefly along the lines of "most people wear a shirt that matches a color in their skirt." She listens carefully and respectfully, considers her feelings, and decides that today she does not want to do what other people do. I can't decide if I am proud or disappointed.

No matter! She is dressed to the nines in her own way and we head to the bathroom for the beauty hairdo. She considers her options out loud as she sorts through the hairdo accessories, "Hmmmm. Braids! No, a gi-mungous poof. No, one braid on top and one in back. No, both!"

"Both?"

"Yes. A poof here and a braid in back and then I'll do the rest."

(I wonder what "the rest" entails and can't wait to see what she has in mind.)

Ta da! One gi-mungous poof in front and a braid in the back. Then Alice places the rest of the clips--every clip in the house--in her hair and declares it beautiful enough. I wish you could see all the clips, but they're in the back.

She tells me that she is now prettier than all the mothers at church. I tell her she certainly looks spectacular. She poses for a couple pictures, "Make sure you can see my braid in the picture. And my shoe sparkle." (that's a tiny stick-on gem she found in the car one day and stuck to her new sandal)

Oh yeah. Self-portrait.

Once at church, she keeps asking when exactly she will get to go up. Her time comes, she sings the song, points at me at the right time, and comes back down with a big smile. Her choice of clothes and hairdo attracts a lot of attention from adults and kids alike. I receive several comments on it throughout church :)  Maybe that's why she likes to be SO over-the-top. 

Anyway, she's a funny, funny little girl that's growing up quickly. I thought the whole experience would make me nostalgic for her fleeting childhood, but I didn't feel that way. I don't tend to miss the stages we've left. I'm surprisingly in love with the girl she is right now, all the time. She's on the edge of something these days, between preschooler and true little girl. It's a little awkward for me 'cuz sometimes I'm not exactly sure what she needs from me or how to play with her in that moment. I just need more time with this new little girl to figure her out all over again.

Bobby's Sunday Summary

Well, This week has been kind of uneventful. Life has continued mostly as normal. Alice and Robert are slowly growing up. Robert is now 28 lbs. Alice is also picking up on reading a little bit. Not a lot, but a bit more then before. I don't really have a lot to say about it. Work is going well, and I am also starting to get more into my calling. I actually extended a calling to someone this week, and released someone else, and I have been conducting Sacrament meeting the last two weeks. So I guess I am slowly starting to come up to speed on it. I guess that is about it.

Raw sewage in the bathtub

Bobby changed Robert's stinky diaper this morning and flushed the contents down the toilet only to see them coming back up into the bathtub. Yuck. We've had some plumbing funkiness at our house the last couple days, but this finally got me to call a plumber. They can't come until 3-5 this afternoon. We're not supposed to use much water at our house until then (they suspect a problem with our main line...groan).

Good thing it's a preschool day! And warmishly sunny. I'm automatically excused from dishes, laundry, and using the toilet, but I must remain home in case they call to say they can come early. Wow! Think of all the free time at home that I have ahead of me! I can't decide if a cell phone would have made this situation better or worse. I wouldn't be tied to the house, but then I'd feel forced to stay away and I would probably spend too much money and mess up Robert's much-needed naps (the boy decided to take a break from sleeping for an hour in the middle of the night). No, staying home is just fine. I'm sure I can find something to work on around here...oh yeah:

Fix Robert's curtains
Sweep, mop, vaccuum
Work on the new garden bed (red dahlias!)
Mow the lawn
Artisan bread for dinner
Mother's Day cards (they might be a little late this year, Grandma)
Family History Center reworkings
Sorting out the next few sewing projects
Decluttering closets (again! That fell apart quickly!)
Read up on post Civil War Reconstruction in the south (family history research)
Take down the dead tree in my backyard
Figure out what the heck to do with 100 wooden chicken eggs
Organize the shed (ewww, spiders)
Nap (make up for that hour that Robert stole last night)

I'm sure I'll find something productive and fun to do with the kids, too ;)

Epilogue: The plumber came that afternoon and used ultra-high-pressure water to clear out the blockage(s). He said that 90% of the blockages he sees are tree roots getting into the main line. Evergreens can be pretty invasive and we've got a bunch of them. Anyway, $400 poorer and a whole lot better educated on the intricacies of sewer work, we now have a functional bathroom and kitchen. I also fixed Robert's curtains, swept the floors twice, read up on the Reconstruction, and crafted sparkly streamers with the girly girl to decorate her room. See? I kept busy ;)

Photos!

Our family photos are done! Jenika did an awesome job. Check them out here.

The kids were completely themselves and we just got to play and play while someone else took the pictures. Love it! I'm super-duper pleased.

Preview

We finally got some family photos with Robert in them. Sorry it took us so long, Buddy. Our photographer, Jenika, is currently sorting through the bajillion action-play shots she took over the course of an hour...cardboard play house, ribbon sticks, pinwheels, and bubbles...oh my! Here's a preview.

Recognize the skirt, Mom? Makes me happy.

Bobby's Sunday Summary

Well, it has been two weeks since I last wrote. This is because last week we spent in Utah at my brother's wedding. Sadly we didn't take a lot of pictures. We didn't steal too many from others just yet, so once we get them we may post some more. One of the highlights of the wedding was the reception. Susan and Robert were not feeling too well so they stayed at her parents while I took Alice. The following are of her dancing with her cousins. The first one after the audio cuts out is Alice trying to kiss her cousin, and me telling her kissing him on the lips is not the best idea. She was not too happy about that.

At the party she ate 2 huge pieces of wedding cake. Had lemonade (the best thing in the world in her opinion) and had a large plate of fruit, and chocolate covered treats. She had a wonderful time. When it was time for us to go home, she cried for half a hour she was so sad to leave.

We also got to spend easter with Susan's family. Alice loved it too. She got to go on an eater egg hunt with her cousins, and got a huge bag of candy. Robert didn't quite get it al, but he still picked up three eggs.

We did get to spend some time with my parents too, who are on a mission in Salt Lake City.

The top one is Alice pushing Robert on top of the Church administration building in down town Salt Lake City.