Update-ish

I'm researching a relative who married her husband twice, in two states, 40 years apart, but who doesn't appear in ANY of the 5 Federal Censuses performed during her married and widowed life. I've found her marriage licenses, I've found her in a couple state censuses, and I clearly see her application for support from her husband's military pension, but she's absent from every Federal Census. It's a fascinating mystery that keeps me up at night, and I was planning to use this quiet time to work on it, but FamilySearch is down right now. I must content myself with a little blogging, then, while I obsessively and frequently check up on FamilySearch :)

James threw up a couple times last night. He's fine now, but tired, and Matthew has been inordinately droopy this morning. Hm. Both are asleep. As I watched James empty his stomach contents onto my living room carpet last night, several times in a row, I felt completely paralyzed and nonchalant at the same time. Like I've seen all this before, so it's not alarming, but I haven't seen it recently enough to act quickly. Bah humbug. Bobby cleaned up the floor while I cleaned up the boy. NOT a fair trade, by the way. Thanks, Bobby.

Droopy Matthew this morning, some laundry in the background.

I've got three loads of laundry left to sort through and fold and put away. That's just what's left of the weekly chore. James' adventure last night only added one load of laundry. Mostly towels...thanks, Bobby.

Yesterday I planted the first seeds for this year's garden. Just a few snapdragons from last year and a Bee Balm or two (new to me, but interesting flower that attracts beneficial insects). These flowers take an especially long time to germinate/grow, so they're the first ones under the grow lights. The seeds are insanely tiny. Barely the size of this period. I sprinkled them in their rows, put a little soil over them, gave them a gentle pat, and suddenly remembered with horror that snapdragon seeds require LIGHT to germinate. This is one reason I don't like dealing with flowers...a HUGE diversity of needs compared to veggies. Ugh. So, I put the grow lights as close as possible, hoping the light would penetrate somehow and kickstart their growth. Might get lucky. Or, might not get any snapdragons this year. Or, just my luck, only the pink ones will germinate ;)

Matthew in the wheelbarrow yesterday, helping me do some spring cleanup.

Crocuses always remind me of the day we brought baby Alice home for the first time.

Alice has recently taken an interest in computer programming. She asked Bobby about it often enough over a period of time that he felt we should give it a go. He ordered a robot kit they could work on together with all sorts of accessories to add functionality. I'm impressed. This is something so far out of my realm of expertise/interest that it never would have happened without Bobby. Robert has been involved, too, but he likes the physical mechanics more at this point...and getting the robot to follow Matthew around the house. Alice is the programming one. She learned how to make the lights blink and got them to spell her name in Morse Code.

Alice getting her "programmer" groove on.

Next, Bobby is going to show her something called, um, what is it? Spark? Stick? Scratch! That's it. I think it's another way to write programs, designed especially for kids.

First Date with Robert

When Alice went to kindergarten, I missed the connectedness of our former relationship. She noticed it, too. Following the advice of a friend of mine, we decided to go on regular "Girls Nights Out" to create new connections and positive memories together. We don't do it every month, but it's at least every quarter, and it's something we both look forward to.

Then I turned around one day and Robert was in first grade and I hadn't gone on a single date with him anywhere (unless taking him to swim lessons counts...). It's not like he noticed or cared, or he would have brought it to my attention 2 years ago. But, I thought I should at least be fair about it and give it a go.

Tonight was our first date. I didn't know what to expect. Robert's a big talker, but not about himself. He talks about possibilities and theories and variables. For example, Alice tells me everything she's feeling and thinking the whole time she's with me. Stream of consciousness. It never stops. She asks me to turn off the radio so I can hear her better. Robert, on the other hand, did not mention the date the entire time we were on it. He was excited, so he was trying to explain to me how he thought the universe could not be infinite because even an expanding object has a boundary. There simply MUST be a top and bottom to the universe somewhere. Then he asked about the speed of light. I told him it's the fastest thing we've ever measured (is it still? am I wrong?) and he wondered if there was something out there faster than light that we just hadn't seen or measured yet. Then he wondered if different colors of light traveled at different speeds and how would you measure that? He invented a machine/robot on the spot that would turn on two colored lights at precisely the same time and set up a camera that could record super, super, super fast to he could see which color light got there first.

Seriously, this was the conversation all the way to the indoor mini golf place.

Once we got golfing, the conversation narrowed to the task at hand. He wasn't the slightest bit competitive with me. He wanted us to keep score, and he recognized when he had had a rough hole (11 strokes on a par 3), but he didn't get upset or sad or disappointed. He just shrugged and said, "Man, that was a bad job. Where's the next one?" And he kept playing happily. About 3/4 the way through the course, he started developing strategies for the game and sharing them with me: never aim for the tricky shortcuts, always go the long way around.

When we came to the final hole where the pirate keeps your ball, we decided not to play it yet. It was pretty empty tonight, and the course was one of the wimpiest/lamest I've ever experienced, so we took the liberty of playing the first 17 holes again and comparing our scores on each hole to the previous round. Again, he was not the slightest bit competitive...just enjoying the information.

I surprised him at the end by saying we could go get a special treat. He was genuinely surprised and excited in only the way Robert is, which is NOTHING like how Alice does it. The conversation on the way to the treat was something like, "I'm really in the mood for a frozen yogurt, but if there's another treat place on the way that has something else I'll like, then I'll be happy with that."

Seriously?! He was a totally easy date. We stopped at TCBY for froyo in a color-changing cup. He was such a charming little man. Those tough, frozen gummy bears and the periodic nose freezes cracked me up. But he wasn't on stage for me. He was just being himself. And Robert's genuine self without siblings is not something I get to see very often. I really, really like this guy. At one point, he had me feel how cold the outside of his neck and chest had become from eating all the ice cream. He wanted to test if I could feel the cold blob of ice cream as it moved down his esophagus.

So much sugar! I think he ended up with five different flavors of froyo and at least that many different toppings.

I asked him what he would like to do on our next date and he said, "Well, I really liked this sports one, so let's do another sport." I suggested shooting hoops at the gym and he agreed. "Basketball is WAY more exercise than mini golf because you're running and throwing and balls at the hoop. Yeah, let's do that."

Adult Swim Lessons

I signed up for adult swim lessons at our local YMCA. Today was the first day.

First off, I wore the wrong bathing suit...my rashguard and biking shorts combo...had to tie a knot in the shirt hem and a knot in the shorts waist to keep it from flopping open in the deep water. I looked awesome. Currently debating whether I do that again next week or put on the sexy hot pink swimsuit I also own (the catalog called it "salmon" but it arrived definitely hot pink). No me gusta ese traje de baño. Siento demasiado desnudo! Quizás puedo vestir ambos...hmmmmm. Hubo una mujer en la classe que llevabó un traje de baño muy largo. It had sleeves to her wrists and leggings to her ankles.

Second, with only my childhood backyard swimming pool (yay for southern CA living!) and my junior high P.E. experience, I was far and above the best swimmer in the group. I thought this might happen, but opted for the "swim lesson" route over the "adult swim club" route because I've never had any real swim coaching. And I figured all I needed was a little guidance and a mountain of accountability to keep me practicing regularly.

Third, the teacher had 4 other adult students in the class ranging from absolute beginner to beginning circular breathing. I mostly swam laps, which was kinda what I was expecting to do anyway. It wore me out. The teacher asked about my goals for this class. I confessed that I was training for a sprint triathlon in September (with a team dividing up the course, not all by myself) and she lit up enthusiastically, "Oh! I love endurance training!" Something inside me wilted at the sound of "endurance training" but I knew it was what I needed to do to get what I wanted. Ugh.

Fourth, I must have drunk half a gallon of pool water. And my nose was burning from inhaling so much chlorine. She had me working on the freestyle stroke with circular breathing on both sides (where I swallowed all of the water), then learning how to flip turn (where most of the water went up my nose). Curse you, flip turn! My actual swimming event will be in a LAKE!

Fifth, I'm actually kinda excited to get better at this stuff.

Sixth, the boys didn't throw too big of a fit when I dropped them off at Child Watch, but we had already negotiated a trade. I get to take my swim lesson in peace and they get to skip quiet time for the day. It worked out for both of us this week. Let's see how the next 5 weeks go :)

Outside Day

Pruned the orchard.

Pruned the serviceberry tree.

Pruned the hydrangeas.

Noted the honeyberry, serviceberry, and chrysanthemums already breaking dormancy  (yikes!)

Cut back the irises that never really turned brown (guess they're used to Idaho winters?)

Played basketball against Robert to 20 points. He's pretty good.

Chased James at the park, trapping him in playground prisons that he always escaped from.

Said goodbye to Erin as she boarded her shuttle to Chicago :(

Chatted with my neighbor over the fence about her backyard landscaping and her campaign for Mayor of Urbana.

Let the hens roam free for a couple hours.

Squished the first mosquito of the season. Those guys seriously don't have an off season.

Watched the boys (even Matthew!) climb the overgrown boxwoods.

Watched Alice play a series of imaginary games with her neighborhood friend...gymnastics/martial arts/award-winning/spy-training/herbalist/domestic servant kind of game all wrapped into one.

Outside is a wonderful thing.

Mother Country

FamilySearch is a wonderful thing. Thanks to their unceasing digitizing/indexing efforts, my mom was able to find a Russian/Ukrainian/German Christening Record from 1842 that finally (FINALLY!) gives us a real, physical clue as to where some of her ancestors lived before immigrating to the U.S.

I'm so stinkin' excited about this!

Why? Because the family immigrated when the kids were older. At least four adult children did not immigrate with the parents. Would be nice to find their stories.

Turns out this family lived in a part of Russia/Prussia that became part of modern-day Ukraine, but many of the families in that area at that time were immigrants from Germany, so some records are in old-fashioned German.

Here's a peek:

Louise Link, born in Johannesthal 28 Apr 1842, child of Christian Link and Catharina Jung.

Johannesthal in 1842! Time and place. It's beautiful.

Another christening record for another one of the children came from a church registry in Worms, Russia. I haven't had a chance to see where that is in relation to Johannesthal, but it's another solid time and place.

Can't wait to learn more!

Farm Naming Again

Seven Sisters is taken! Dang it all. It's even a local company, so maybe I sort of got the idea subliminally from one of their ads.

Maybe I'll call my farm something Mantis-y.

Mantises are not cute bugs, but they're easily recognized and extremely useful in the garden. They don't hurt people, so far as I can tell, though they seem capable enough.

Closet Mantid Farm
Mantis Foods

Maybe I could come up with a word combination that emulates the vowel sounds in "Susan"...

"Fruit Bin"
"Smooth Fin"
"True Friend"
"New End"

Meh.

My kids initials? ARJM...
Majr Farm
JamR Foods

That just looks like I can't spell.

What about my kids in general? I looked up synonyms for "kids"...

Stock and Seed Produce
Four Bairn Farm
Uterine Kin Foods

Ugh. I don't want to eat anything that shares a breath with 'uterus', y'know?

I agonized over the names of my children for months, but now that they've been around for a few years, I don't even think twice about why we picked one name over another. Well, except Matthew, but he's still young, and the last one. Anyway, I could call the farm something boring and straightforward like "Evans Farm", but that doesn't communicate anything about me or my reasons for doing this work. I want a name that I can hold to my chest, y'know? Something that is personally meaningful to me, but isn't obviously meaningful to everyone else. Meaning in disguise.

For example, naming my kids Alice or Robert doesn't turn heads like "Brighamina" or "Beryl" would. People don't respond with, "Oh, is that a family name?" And yet, they ARE family names with personal significance to me. Meaning in disguise.

I want a farm name like that. But poetic.


Hmmmmmmmmmmm.

Ravenous no more!

I finally found food for my 6-legged carnivore babies! Now I can stop having nightmares about them dying of starvation. Whew.

Turns out, the pinhead crickets were the winner. My first few crickets were just too big last time. I talked to the pet store guy (the last pet store in town to have anything even CLOSE to small enough for these mantids) and he worked really hard to get 30 of the very teeniest crickets out of their cricket enclosure. Truly small. Smaller than ants. Then he showed me what I would need for housing and feeding the crickets. Live food is a delight in and of itself. I have to keep the crickets happy and healthy for them to be good food for the mantids.

*sigh*

So, $1.80 in crickets and $8 in cricket supplies later, we are now the proud owners of a praying mantis habitat AND a cricket habitat. Both are thriving.

I guess my little farm now includes three kinds of livestock.

Pinhead cricket habitat. See those leggy little dark spots under the toilet paper roll?

Mantid habitat, with a few crickets remaining. Crumpled wet napkin (for water), ring of window screening (for climbing on), and pencil for scale. The little lines are mantids and the little dots are crickets.

A close up of the mantid habitat. I count 6 mantids and 1 cricket.

When I dumped those first few crickets in, I literally saw praying mantis heads turn in eager interest. Did they hear them? Feel their movements? Whatever it was, this time was different from all the other food attempts, and the mantids were clearly paying attention. They crept up slowly and watched the crickets walking around. One cricket got just close enough to a hungry mantis and the mantis pounced faster than I could see. End of the road for cricket #1. Then another mantis found a meal. And another one. I was convinced at that moment that the crickets would work. I could finally breathe.

*whew*

How does a mantis eat a cricket? Well, these guys appear to eat them from the abdomen up in 10 minutes or so. Sometimes they eat the cricket's head, sometimes they leave it. It's hard for me to tell which mantids have eaten and which haven't. I'm thinking I'll just make sure there are 5-10 crickets roaming around in there at all times. Let the mantids control their own feeding regimen.

How soon will they outgrow their enclosure?

How big will they get before it's warm enough to put them outside?

Worries for another day. Right now, I'm just celebrating the fact that they probably won't starve to death :)

Picture update

Pheasant's Eye Narcissus bulbs getting a little antsy for spring...in JANUARY!

Robert lost a tooth last week and promptly lost another one today. One more loose one on top, then we're done for a while.

Matthew selfie

Only little kids are cute this close up. I might miss this when it's gone.

Alice reading stories from the phone while we hang out after church. Check out the FitBit knock-off strapped to her ankle. This girl loves it. Loves it!

The boys and I met some friends at Soccer Planet today for a private field trip/party. James ran himself silly and fell asleep on the way home. Matthew kept telling me over and over at lunch, "Me happy! Sockuh pawty. Me go sockuh pawty. Play ball-ee! Me happy!"

Little Ham.

Lookin' up to Little Ham.

Good Food Festival in Chicago

I really, really, reeeeeeeeeeeeeally want to attend this 1-day event in Chicago, including the urban farm bus tour (*squeeeeeee*), but I don't want to go alone.

Is anyone crazy enough to come with me?  Saturday, March 18th, 10am-5pm. We can split the gas and parking costs. Festival is free. Bus tour is $75.

http://www.goodfoodfestivals.com/program/saturday/

Please? PLEASE?!

I need more urban farming friends who also happen to be foodies...*sigh*

"My fwend"

Robert and James were sliding on the new dining room floor yesterday while Matthew looked on from Bobby's arms in the kitchen. Out of nowhere, Matthew points to the boys playing and says, "He my fwend."

I had never heard him use the word "friend" before, and it's a word I think about a lot, so this caught my attention.

"Who's your friend? Robert?"

"No." He shakes his head and points again, emphasizing the first word, "He my fwend."

Incredulous, I ask, "You mean James?!"

"Yah," and he smiles and lays his head on Bobby's shoulder.

Then I started thinking back over the last couple weeks...James has been kinder to Matthew...they do a lot more together these days. In fact, they've even started spending Quiet Time together. Matthew doesn't really need a nap every day, and it's better for everyone if James doesn't take a nap, so I've been letting them play together during Quiet Time.

Then I suddenly remembered something James had said earlier this week...

"Mommy, I used to not like Quiet Time, but now I really like it." Then he beamed at me and turned to Matthew, "C'mon, Matthew, let's go!" And they bounced back to James' room for more fun.

I did not know if this would ever happen. I'm completely astonished. And so happy. I'm not counting on it staying this way, just enjoying the moment.

James and Matthew enjoying the view down into the atrium from the 8th floor of the Psychology Building at the U of I. We went there this week to participate in another language study.

Mantis Obsession

Okay, I think I need to step back from this whole mantis thing for a while.

Whew.

Here's what happened. I could not sleep that first night because I knew these baby mantises were STARVING and they would all be dead in a few hours because of me.

Turned out, I didn't kill them. Yet.

Feeding the mantises became my obsession. I called pet stores about fruit flies (all out). I emailed friends about fruit flies and ants (weird looks). I dug around my backyard, through frozen soil, where some anthills were last summer (kid nuclear war erupted inside the house). I've had half-rotten food on my counter every day for the last three months (compost bucket). No fruit flies! To no avail. One pet store finally offered pinpoint crickets which were about the size of black ants and looked possibly small enough to work.

Bought five.

$0.44

I'm pretty sure the guy who sold them to me was thinking this transaction was a complete waste of his time. Thank goodness I had a dollar in my coat, or I would have had to use a credit card. He scooped a few crickets into a plastic baggie and inflated it before tying a knot in the top. After handing over my change, he asked if I wanted a bag to carry my purchase outside in.

I couldn't tell if he was serious or just trying to make a joke. I was a little more concerned about how to peel James and Matthew away from the Koi pond without causing a scene.

Well, I got the crickets home and peeked in the jar. I was expecting six mantises and counted about fifteen. WHAT?! Apparently, the egg case had not completely finished hatching.

So, they needed a bigger space.

I accidentally drowned a few mantises in the transfer. Ugh. Mom guilt!

The five crickets went in with the fifteen mantises and there they have stayed for the last 24 hours, completely unharmed. Actually, once I saw one of the bigger crickets beating up on a weak, semi-drowned mantis. Total mom guilt.

So maybe they aren't as hungry as I thought? Maybe crickets aren't the right food? Do they sell baby praying mantis formula!?

Sheesh. I'm worrying too much about this. At least they now have a food source besides each other :) I'll keep looking for fruit flies. In the meantime, they sit on our kitchen counter, in the middle of winter, with a slim chance of ever seeing the outside world.

James enjoying our new dining room floor. It's soooooo slippery that he can lay on his tummy and push off the wall to fly. It's the closest he's ever been to fulfilling one of his Superman dreams.

Mantis Haiku

Six survive the night

Exoskeleton now brown

Hungry for first meal

Here's a picture for scale. One is perched on the empty egg case.

Robert had found the egg case in our stick pile, which makes me think that I knew the mother. You see, there were a couple praying mantises around our house last year that I watched grow up. Or maybe it was just one and he/she moved around a lot. They/It started out green and half an inch long in the early summer and finally reached 4-5 inches and totally brown by fall. They were especially fond of the corner of our house near the stick pile. I'm wondering if maybe these were that mantis's first brood. That might explain why we only had nine babies on Robert's shelf instead of a hundred. Yikes!

And now that they've turned brown, I'm thinking Robert must have discovered them very, very soon after they hatched when their exoskeletons were still soft and yellow.

Less than a day old and they're already so strong and so fierce! I'm kinda getting attached to them. I'd like to try and feed them small insects. So, if you live near me and you happen to know where I could collect a few gnats/fruit flies in the middle of winter, please let me know.

Soon.

I hope they don't eat each other.