Edith is Missing, and a plea for help

Two big piles of black and white feathers on the back lawn. A third pile in the neighbor's yard.

One drop of blood on the chicken feeder.

A tuft of reddish grey fur snagged on the chicken wire near a hole about 6 inches around.

Red fox.

Now there's no question of what happened to Agnes 3 days ago.

Penny stands alone, nervous little biddy, and I'm a nervous wreck. I have GOT to protect these birds. They are self-sufficient and practically zero-maintenance in every way, but completely vulnerable and helpless against night predators. My chicken-keeping friends in our previous neighborhood have had no predator problems, even when the coop is open to everything all night long. My neighborhood is just a little bit 'rougher', I suppose, on poultry. We're only a few blocks from a restored prairie and protected natural wildlife habitat. I like the idea of foxes having a natural place to live. I just don't like them stealing my birds.

Time to get defensive.

Short term: I installed a solid door on the coop so I can lock Penny in at night.

Long term: I've designed a new predator-proof pen that should be more stylish, easier to maintain, and much more spacious than the current, temporary, woefully naive, and grossly inadequate setup:

Farmer Bob and his ladies are in there just to give you a sense of scale. It's essentially an enclosure that goes around the existing coop. Hardware cloth (1/2-inch) will be screwed into the frame on every side, even the floor and ceiling. The rectangle bottom is composed of 2"x12" lumber, sort of like a raised garden bed, so I can use the "deep litter" method for managing the chicken droppings (i.e. self-composting). Here are a few more views of the same idea:

The top third will have a waterproof cover and fancy fabric "tent" to keep my ladies dry and stylin'. And the pen itself should be large enough for 4-5 laying hens to live out their days in peace without additional running room (though I do have plans to let them forage in the orchard once it's mature enough to provide them shelter/shade).

I will need help constructing this, to be sure. I'm working out a few more details before gathering the materials and sending out an S.O.S to all my local tool-wielding friends. If you are local and you want to help, please let me know if you prefer next Saturday (July 7th), or sometime between the 9th and the 14th.

Power tools. Yeah.

Buddy's New Swimsuit...

...and he's just about outgrown it. It's a size 4, according to the pattern, the same size as Alice's pink and purple suit that I made last year, but I added 3 inches to the shirt length (to avoid another awkward ruffle or creative striping maneuver). I managed to sew it at my friend's house over a couple of evenings. I'm getting more practice with her serger. The whole project from purchasing fabric to finished hems took about 4 hours. Buddy loves it. I love it.

26 Weeks

BoGah is officially 26 weeks along now. The end of the second trimester. The beginning of viability outside the womb. Were he to be born next week, he would be on the edge of what modern medical science could rescue. Every week beyond that pretty much doubles his chances at survival and a healthy future with few side affects.

Not that I expect him to come early. This is just something I come to realize at this point in every pregnancy so far :)

He's just about here. 

Am I ready?

Emotionally, I now have space for him. Physically, the pregnancy itself is becoming more cumbersome and restricting than I like...especially in such an active time of year for our family (and my farm!). Sometimes I catch myself thinking, "What the HECK is wrong with me? Why can't I handle this task like I used to?" And then I remember that I'm 6 months pregnant. Mowing the lawn is no longer an option. Holding Robert while I'm standing is pretty much over. Sleeping through the night? A dream of the past. Sometimes I catch myself thinking, "Things will be easier when he's finally born." Bwah ha ha haaaaa! What a joke. One thing will get easier: sleeping on my back. Everything else will get more complicated :)

As far as BoGah's physical accommodations once he arrives, I'm almost there. Just gotta put the crib back up, find a dresser, move the changing table and nursing chair in there, and then find a place to stash the sewing mess. Hold on, maybe I'm NOT almost there. *groan*

And there's also a list of things I'd like to get done before he arrives...oh man, we need some name suggestions.

Follow-up

After some thought about the hairdo and dressing fiasco yesterday, I realized that Alice is still developing her sense of time. She doesn't know or care what time it is and she has NO idea how long something will take to complete. We had a calm little chat about it yesterday afternoon while snuggling on the couch (another Love & Logic staple) to brainstorm ideas for the "next time" our morning is a little crunched for time. I mentioned that fancy hairdos take quite a bit of time to create and that I would need to know ahead of time if she was planning on a fancy hairdo some morning. She may even have to eat her breakfast a little faster than usual to make sure there's enough time for everything else. She felt that was fair.

This morning, I asked her early on about the hairdo and she helped me carve the time for it. No meltdowns. No sobbing. No frustration. She had her outrageous, attention-grabbing hairdo for camp and I had a quick, well-timed morning. All was well:

Two braids in the front, two ponytails on the sides, and two braids in the back.
Adorned with a crown headband and a froofy pink clip in the front. 100% Alice.

Now if I can only remember this long enough to nip it in the bud next time. Sigh.

Agnes is missing

I went to refill the chicks' food this afternoon and found one of them missing. Agnes, our black australorp. There was an unusual amount of feathers about, but no blood or flesh or any other sign of carnage. I had left the pen door unlocked overnight. I presume she was carried away. Or perhaps she managed an escape. She was always the bolder one, less afraid of everything, more vocal about her needs, and the first to try anything. Maybe she'll show up again in a couple days. Probably not.

This is the second chicken we've lost since purchasing them 3 months ago. I didn't expect to have issues like this. I've taken measures to secure the chicks' pen and coop more tonight. Who knows if the kidnapper will return?

I am hesitant to jump into locating another bird right away. If I do decide to fill out my flock again, I will probably need to add at least two birds. Chickens can be cruel to newcomers...worse than 7th grade girls. A single newcomer literally will be attacked by the rest of the group. Sometimes killed. It can be stressful for everyone. Edith and Penny seem the nervous type...they might fall in line behind a newcomer. Edith is bossy, though, and may issue a death sentence. If there's an "old" group and a "new" group, at least each chicken has a place in her own order until the two groups duke it out and finally blend.

I do have another friend who's willing to sell me a couple hens about the right age. They're just beginning to lay. A docile breed, light-colored, that literally squats in place when you approach them. Absolutely catchable and pettable. Alice and Robert will be quite pleased to have those around.

Let me think about the coop and pen arrangements some more. Four chickens...they'll need more running room. Is there time to make the upgrade before this pregnancy becomes unwieldy?

Cinderella Passes Away and a Diva is Born

Our Cinderella pumpkin plant died yesterday. I'm pretty sure it was a wilt disease it picked up from one of the flying insect pests feeding on it (i.e. striped cucumber beetles and squash bugs). Even though I started that plant from seed 2 months ago and dreamed of enormous, orange pumpkins to carve and cook up in another couple months, it was a surprising relief to see it kick the bucket. That plant was a beast! It was as tall as my pygmy corn, shading and swarming and swelling beyond its garden bed borders. We have another Cinderella pumpkin plant in a pot on the back patio. The bugs haven't paid much attention to it so far. We may still get pumpkins in the end.

In other news, Alice had a meltdown fit this morning about her hairdo for Kindercamp. She tried to describe it to me, but my feeble attempts at hairdressing (NOT a skill I've worked on at ANY point in my life, by the way) were only causing her frustration. She wanted a very specific look that she saw in one of our books. I asked her to find the picture so I could have some idea of what she was talking about. It took her ten minutes of searching through the right book and she still couldn't find the picture she was thinking about. Time was short this morning, so I left to take a shower. Commence the first dramatic meltdown. By the time I had showered and dressed, Bobby was braiding Alice's hair...the first step in a several-step process that Alice had settled on while I was away. We had to leave for Kindercamp in 10 minutes. I told Alice we could work on her hair after she was dressed and ready. Commence a second dramatic meltdown, this time (thankfully) confined to her room. I get Buddy ready and I load up the car. A few minutes later, I come back to check on Alice's progress. She's pouting, naked, on her bed.

Ah, well, thanks to Love and Logic, I had a stress-free solution for myself in this situation. This was Alice's problem, not mine. I decided on two logical end results that I could live with and presented them to her. In the best nonchalant and cool-as-a-cucumber voice I could muster (must...keep...calm!), I let her know that her ride to Kindercamp was leaving in 2 minutes. It would be a big bummer if she missed her ride to camp and ended up staying home in her room for the duration of camp...I'm a busy lady, you know, and I was counting on having her at camp this morning and I can't have her scurrying about the house interrupting up my plans. It would be very sad if she missed camp today, and it was a good thing she still had two minutes to get dressed and catch her ride.

Then I left the room and waited in the car, fully willing to see either consequence through to the end. Bobby stayed with her in her room. I can only imagine the conversation that ensued. That's one of my favorite parts about the Love and Logic method. I decide on several consequences I can live with and Alice decides how to proceed. She does the thinking. And since it was her choice, and I was genuinely okay with either end result, I could genuinely calm down. This was her problem, her choice, not mine.

Within two minutes, Alice was dressed and ready to go. The car ride was pleasant. We joked about stuff, and there was no further emotional drama. We also made it to camp on time.

In the car, she said calmly, "Mom, I didn't really want to wear this shirt, but I put it on anyway because I was worried that what you said would come true."

Did I mention that she doesn't like any of her clothes anymore, either? Where does all of this come from?!

We wonder daily what the teenage years have in store for us. I have hope, however, that as we work through these situations over the next few years, we'll have some sort of stable groundwork in place to handle the more volatile emotions to come.

All of us need to develop a few new coping strategies. Yikes.

Bobby's Sunday Summary

Well this week was fairly normal.  On Friday Susan had promised Alice that they would camp out, but neglected to inform me.  It turned out to be a lot of fun though.  We were all running a bit late that day so I ran out and picked up some pizza and stuff for root beer floats.  I figured it was a special fun day so we would have a fun dessert too.  Well, our wonderful neighbors saw us setting up the tent, and invited us over to use their fire pit that night too, and just before we got over there they called to tell us that they have everything for smores.  So Alice and Robert got to eat breadskticks, they don't really like pizza, root beer floats, and smores for dinner.  Then Alice and Susan slept out in the tent while Buddy and I slept inside.

On Saturday we work up early, picked raspberries at a friend's house, cleaned our house and then went to an open house at the pollenatarium, bee/plant fertilization research.  It is within walking distance from our house so we loaded the kids up in the strollers and went over.  Robert promptly fell asleep.

But Alice had a good time, painting a flower pot, listening to stories, exploring the small museum they have there, and finally planting a flower in her pot.

 

Love Notes From Quiet Time

My sister, Erin, got Alice interested in reading again while she was here a couple weeks ago. Alice has finished all the Bob Books we have on-hand, so now she's slowly attempting to work through "regular" books. She's also doing more of her own writing lately. She prepared a present for me while she was working in quiet time today and these were the attached notes:

 

Translation: Dear Susan. I like you to open this. See you later.

Translation: I know Susan is my mom.

(Potty Training Buddy)

(Having children has taught me one thing above all else: I cannot predict what they will do, and once I decide I've found a pattern to their behavior, it changes. So, if it's a GOOD behavior I want to encourage, I just don't talk about it out loud, for fear of jinxing the groove.)

(Hence, the parentheses. This is a whispered conversation just between you and me. I'll be stating the actual facts, not making predictions about future behavior.)

(Buddy has made progress. After five days of wearing underwear during the day and diapers at night, he finally stopped himself from having an accident, brought it to my attention, and we rushed him into the bathroom just in time to catch the second half of it in the potty. Once. A miraculous "once" that signals progress. He also mildly resisted the night diaper, which is glorious progress as well.)

(I'll spare you the messy details, but share that his success:accident ratio is about 50:50 right now. The first few days, I was asking him about potty turns every couple of hours. The last few days, I've eased up on the offers and only asked at critical times (i.e. at waking, before/after quiet time, before an outing, 30-45 minutes after a large drink or helping of fruit, etc.). We're also spending quite a bit of time at home so it's easier to keep his potty schedule in mind.)

(Potty training is messy business. I don't enjoy it. I do, however, secretly love the visible/tangible example of a life skill being mastered. I don't know what will happen to Buddy's potty training ability when Bo-gah is born in October. We'll deal with that when it comes. I'm just happy to see progress right now. Wa-hoo!)

Impulse Control

The kids and I were picking raspberries at Katie's place the other day. Each of us had a quart-size bucket to fill. When we had gone through all of the bushes (which were covered in gorgeous, ripe, sweet raspberries) my bucket was full, Alice had about a cup, and Buddy's bucket was completely empty. Buddy thought we couldn't leave until his bucket was full, sweet boy, and he got into the car quite disappointed...but with a bulging tummy.

Alice held her precious berries on her lap and we drove home. She suddenly said, "Do you know one difference between kids and grown-ups?"

"What's that?"

"Well, when kids see something they want to eat, they just eat it. And grown ups save it so their bucket is full."

I was blown away by her observation. Excitedly,  I introduced her to the term "impulse control". Alice really got into the discussion, especially when she learned that 1) it takes practice to control one's impulses, and 2) she was well on her way to mastering that skill. I compared Buddy's berry-picking method with hers and mine. Buddy ate every berry that he could touch before thinking to put it in his bucket. I ate none of my berries so I could make freezer jam with them. Alice, somewhere in the middle, ate a ton and managed to purposefully save some for dinner that night (without prompting from me). She beamed at this realization, adding her own subtle jab at Buddy, "Since Buddy is two, if he had saved any of his berries, I would be REALLY surprised."

"Yes, that would be a surprise, because Buddy hasn't had much practice with impulse control. He's still quite impulsive."

Then I mentioned that potty training Buddy was one of his first major experiences with impulse control. It's something he needs to practice. He's getting better at it and we can all measure his progress. Eventually, he will be able to control/predict his elimination needs and plan accordingly.

That is a goal we are all excited to achieve. Even Alice. She's genuinely excited for him.

I told Bobby about this experience later and he mentioned that Alice has a few impulses she could work on a little harder to control. For example, we've seen a dramatic increase in the frequency and intensity of her explosive episodes of disappointment. They're more than simply dramatic, folks, if you've ever witnessed one yourself. So, that's on my parenting agenda now: find a moment to discuss Alice's meltdowns with her within the framework of "impulse control." She's made great strides in ignoring some of Robert's blatant attempts to rile her up. And now that's she's caught a glimpse of the big picture, I bet she can figure out these meltdowns, too.

Father's Day Interviews 2012

Here's a little something we put together for Bobby for Father's Day. I didn't think Buddy would be able to answer any of the questions, so I didn't print him one of his own this year, but he really wanted to take part. His answers are to the right of Alice's. He also wanted to add a picture. He was very specific as to what was what in the picture and I marked that for him.

Translation notes: 

When asked about how tall his Dad was, Buddy said, "Like this," and raised his arm as far as as he could reach while kneeling on a chair. I tried to draw a stick figure doing it.

When asked about what his Daddy wears, Buddy said, "Alice's clothes!" and both kids burst out laughing. I did too. 

Insect Identification

We've caught a few of these beauties in our new home and fed them to the chickens:

Turns out, it's a common old "House Centipede" that is quite beneficial and worth keeping around...if you can get over how creepy-gross they look and how freakishly fast they move. The ones we've found are a couple inches long. Ugh. They dwell in the underbelly of your home, protecting you from moths and cockroaches. I'm okay with that...usually.

While taking care of my friends' critters this week, I found a new kind of spider. I'm not a spider lover, so I've tried to learn more about the ones I do find just to take the edge off. It helps to know if a certain spider is out to get you, y'know? And if I know something about a certain bug, I can calm the kids down, too. Alice did eventually learn to identify and tolerate Carpenter Bees. She's also a pro around garden spiders and earwigs, as long as they don't try to touch her. Anyway, here's the new spider:

 

You know that shuddering feeling you have right now? That can be overcome with exposure and education ;) This is a Venusta Orchard Spider. It lives is semi-wooded areas and makes a mess of a web about 1-foot across. Not harmful to humans. That watermelon-shaped abdomen just seems to shimmer in the sunlight. I thought it was a silver spider, at first. Anyway, it's pretty. And it wants to live outside. I'll let it be.

Corn is Tasseling

My corn is barely 2 feet tall and it's already tasseling. I'm trying a "pygmy" variety that's meant to grow in colder climates with shorter growing seasons. I wonder if the ears of corn themselves will also be miniature. Hope not.

I have striped cucumber beetles present in the garden. They are enjoying the leaves of all my curcurbits (melons, pumpkins, and cukes), but the damage isn't too bad yet. Next year, I will need to start the marigolds MUCH earlier if I want them blooming by June to protect from cucumber beetles. And the giant Cinderella pumpkin plants are quickly overtaking the entire bed of corn. Time to prune a bit :) Next year, I'll plant a smaller kind of squash plant to mingle with the corn. Maybe butternut.

The limas are going crazy with this recent heat. They LOVE it.

Tomatoes are flowering, even the "colossal" variety.

Sunflowers are 4 feet tall with no sign of a flower bud yet.

Bobby helped me bend a few more arches to expand my squirrel exclosure. Woo hoo! Most of the yard and garden stuff I can do myself, even if it takes me longer. There are only a couple jobs that really demand two people at a time: bending the frames and drilling crossbars onto the frames.

I got to report 0.91" of rain in my rain gauge this morning. Kinda felt nice to report something other than zero. Kinda nice to know that I'll only have to water the garden a little bit tomorrow.

The peas are still producing, even with the heat. I'll keep them in until I'm ready to put something else in their place. I'll start preparing my "fall" garden this week by planting chard and broccoli seeds indoors.

Weeding hasn't been much of an issue this year. The garden is brand new, so weed seeds haven't had a chance to blow/settle in. I'm also planting my veggies in a dense array, as outlined in How to Grow More Vegetables and Fruits* (and Fruits, Nuts, Berries, Grains, and Other Crops) *than you ever thought possible on less land than you can imagine. This is my first year with this method, but John Jeavons makes it easy with all his charts, graphs, planning worksheets, and helpful illustrations. It's a joy to have this author as an urban food production mentor :)

Seeing my garden as it is just makes me happy. I can love the humid heat and the thunderstorms a little bit more because they are essential to my garden's success. The blistering sun that makes my back patio torture to visit after 9AM is the same sun that keeps my garden healthy and growing. And if I ever figure out a way to grow some sort of edible shade over half of the patio, I think that will strike a better balance. Something like hardy kiwi or grapes will grow densely in the summer (cool, relaxing shade) and lose all its leaves in the winter (warm, inviting sun). It's the framework/structure for this green shade that's the tricky part. Gotta think that through some more. I should start a new Pinterest board for it, actually :)

Bobby's Sunday Summary

This week I was in California at a conference for work.  It was not that exciting.  It was nice to be able to talk face to face with some of the people I work with in other parts of the world, but the content was directed much more at people who use what I work on, and not much towards the people who are making it.

But it was very nice to finally be home again.  It was a hot day on Saturday so we set up the kiddy pool for the kids to swim in.  They were having fun, but then Alice had to go to a friend's house for a birthday party, so buddy was left to swim by himself.  This is what he came up with.

Random thoughts

Bear with me a moment while I spew out some random thoughts. 

There are a few things I'm REALLY good at while Bobby is out of town:

1) blogging
2) letting the schedule fly out the window
3) spending money
4) staying up late at night
5) catching up on to-do lists, especially if the tasks involve spending money or staying up late

There are a few things I'm REALLY good at while I'm pregnant:

1) getting emotional
2) forgetting obvious and important things
3) trying to prove I can still do everything like I used to, which I can't

Those conditions together, though? I'm a bit of a flake: tired, overcommitted and careless with commitments, easily emotional and yet often detached, just kinda living each moment on a whim...whims like eating out for dinner, spontaneous movie nights and initiating potty training. Buddy gets it, he loves it, but I'm the one asking him every hour if he'd like to have a potty turn. Who knows how far we are from self-directed elimination behaviors? The allure of a "whim" is that there's no commitment. Potty training is a serious commitment...but it still qualifies as a "whim" in that all other commitments fall by the wayside in order to focus on developing that single skill. With one decision, I've "released" myself from all other non-essential to-do lists. Instantly. It's rather irresponsible of me in some ways, but I'm flying solo this week and riding a wave of hormones, so bear with me.

I cried today when the kids' music CD played a song about two brothers.

I buckled Robert into his car seat and then promptly locked him into the car, with my keys in the ignition, only minutes before I had to pick up Alice from Nature Camp.

*sigh*

I called Alice's camp to tell them I would be a bit late picking her up. The locksmith came in a matter of minutes, sprung Buddy loose, and wouldn't accept payment. He said he doesn't charge for baby rescues. I didn't really know what to say to that...the lockout was completely my fault (and these accursed maternity pants WITHOUT pockets)...I felt more embarrassed by his generosity than grateful for it. Then the Nature Camp didn't charge me for the late pickup, even though their policy clearly states that parents will be charged $15 for every 10 minutes the child stays after pickup time. Again, instead of feeling grateful, I bristled that I wouldn't have a chance to "pay" for my oversight. No one held me to any of the natural consequences of my dumb mistake. I did something stupid and there's nothing I can do to make up for it. But I WANT to make up for it. And I'm still feeling embarrassed about it all. Pbbbbsh.

That's it. No more random thoughts to share. Blargh.

Intimidated by a rain gauge

A gardening friend of mine introduced me to the CoCoRaHS network, which is a community-based weather monitoring program. People all over the country have these nifty rain gauges and hail pads in their own backyards and report daily precipitation throughout the year. It's fascinating how a storm can be so inconsistent in the amount of water it dumps on an area.

Anywho, I've wanted to track my own garden's water gatherings for some time. I thought this program would be an inspirational and motivational kick in the pants...as well as a service to the research community :) I kinda thought signing up would include some sort of medal.

Instead of a medal, I have a fancy rain gauge gizmo that needs to go up in my yard in a very specific way:

"Mount the gauge on a post that you walk past each day so you will be reminded to read and empty the gauge daily. Ideally, the post should be a 4"x4" or 2-2"x4" nailed together. Where possible do not mount near buildings or trees that would prevent rainfall from reaching the gauge. The gauge should be mounted so that the top of the gauge is level and is 6" higher than the top of the post."

Here are the parts of those instructions that strike fear into my soul: "daily" and "gauge is level"

I, dear friends, am not a precision instrument. Attributes like "daily" and "level", while often part of my plans, do not always make it into the finished product. It shouldn't be a big deal, right? Just mount the dumb thing and get going...aargh! And yet I'm still sitting here whining to y'all instead.

Why does this small project inspire such dread?

I suspect it has something to do with rigid, universal expectations and third-party accountability. I haven't had any of that stuff in my life since grad school coursework (i.e. 8 years and counting). I'm kinda scared I'll do it wrong.

There you have it.

Now I'm off to nail two 2"x4"'s to each other and make this work.

Garden Update...early June

June is my favorite time in the gardening season: the plants are all in and growing well, temperatures are still pleasant for outside work, and the weeds/bugs just haven't settled in yet. We also get to harvest our first crop. Peas! The kids love to pick and eat them. Robert will even eat the pea leaves for fun. This was my first successful batch of snap peas (edible podded), so I'll be growing those again in the future (more veggie bang for your effort buck). The buttercrunch lettuce was a bitter disaster, despite it's bountiful and beautiful foliage. I'll be growing it somewhere a lot shadier this fall to see if sweet homegrown lettuce can actually appear under my care.

Here are a couple snapshots of the garden now (compare it to 3 weeks ago):

 

The metal framing is the skeleton for my upcoming "squirrel exclosure." The first approach will be to drape the frame with heavyweight bird netting. There are ample food sources in my neighborhood for squirrels (i.e. two neighbors who actively feed them all year because they're "just so darn cute!"), and squirrels haven't discovered my garden as a potential food source yet (i.e. it's just greens at this point), so the bird netting may be perfectly sufficient. If the squirrels start chewing holes it the netting, however, I'll be forced to take a hit in convenience and install chicken wire. Ugly stuff, harder to work with, but effective. I could also let the chickens loose in the mulch paths. They chase away squirrels. Actually, Agnes chases them away and the other two biddies follow her because they're terrified to be left alone for half a second. Guard chickens. Yeah.

The plan is to assemble this structure over each garden bed so I can eventually remove the perimeter fence. 

Everything is planted and growing well. I love, love, love June. I spy blossoms on my tomatoes and cantaloupes. My Dad spotted the lima beans as "pole", not "bush" type. It was tricky putting in a support frame when the plants were already 18 inches tall and growing into each other, but now it's okay. Dang it all. I didn't remember to double check if there was a "bush" variety of lima bean. 

I have a miniature bunny enjoying my bean plants. It's just a baby, barely weaned, that can hop effortlessly through the 2"x3" holes in the fencing. My awesome veggies appear to be making it fat, however, and I suspect it won't fit through the fence much longer. I hope wandering bunnies will also be deterred by the bird netting in the future...maybe my beans won't be worth the extra chewing hassle :) Would Agnes chase bunnies away? Bunnies usually strike when the ladies are already in bed.

Bummer.

Awkward Sleeping...Again

Buddy's quiet times are a work in progress. He loves them.  I love to hear him play out his stories and jump around. The problem is, he puts himself to asleep about the time Alice is due to come out of her quiet time. Sometimes I let him sleep, sometimes I wake him up and just go on with the day. This time, I let him sleep:

He's sprawled out on top of an overturned Lego table. He clearly has his blankie with him, so it was a planned rest. His face and arms were bumpy with carpet and blankie imprints for about 45 minutes after he woke up.

Bobby's Sunday Summary

This week has been rather busy.  We have had Susan's parents and one of her sisters in town.  We did a number of staycation things.

We rented Paddle Boats at the park.

We also went to the Children's Museum in Indi.

It's a...

...BOY! Now, my maternal "instincts" have been wrong 3 out of 3 times regarding the gender of my unborn children. You would think I had learned my lesson by now :) And unlike the shock of Buddy's gender revelation, I'm actually ready to take in this little guy right away. I love my Buddy. He has personally demonstrated to me that boys from my loins can be sweet and fun and hilarious and loving. All the sweet boys belonging to my awesome friends and family just wasn't a convincing argument on its own, crazy enough :) I'm not afraid of the boy stereotype anymore. I'm also excited to see Buddy interact with this new little fellow as a brother. I love that Robert will have a brother and a sister to bounce off of as he grows up. Alice, well, she and I are now in the gender minority. I kinda like that. She's girly enough to balance a whole legion of boys :)

What did we see of this little man? He was generally calm. My first impression of the fellow was seeing his hand resting up above his head. Dad said, "Oh, that's just like me, it's definitely a boy." Then his mouth was wide open for a while. The tech took the measurements she needed in a relatively short time. All, that is, except for a profile of his face and the all-important gender shot. The bitty babe was turned toward the tech and kept his secrets to himself until the very end.

He and this pregnancy are both developing smack-dab in the middle of "normal" range. The midwife, Vanessa, even termed it a little bit boring. I kinda like it boring at this stage in the game.

The best part, though, was that my parents and sister were present with me and Bobby at the ultrasound appointment. I was a bit worried that the hospital wouldn't let 5 adults attend the session, but the room was plenty large and our technician was chatty and fun.

We came back from the appointment and Alice shrieked, "Is it a GIRL?!" She was a bit disappointed at first (yes, there were tears), but appears to be recovering well enough. She can't think of one boy name.

And now that the kid's gender is known, it's all the more real to me. I'm itching to start preparing his room. Get Buddy potty trained. Settle on a bigger car. Pull out the baby clothes. Find a name...erk.

Bobby's Sunday Summary

Yesterday was a very busy day.  Susan and I are not really social at all.  But Alice is very very social.  She threw her first party yesterday, just to have a party.  It was the opening of her museum.  It had exhibits like a children's museum.  She had dinosaur models to play with, chickens to look at, peas from our garden to pick, and several other things.  The party included dinner and she picked out the menu.  fruit salad, grilled hot dogs, grilled chicken, a star cake, pink lemonade, and two bags of barbecue potato chips.  She also invited about 30 people.  It was a wild and crazy time, but Alice was totally in her element.  I don't know if I have ever seen her so happy before.

Here are some pictures she and her friends took.

Sense of Humor

I've been trying to figure out why Buddy feels so different from Alice at this age. They say you shouldn't compare your kids to each other. I try not to. The reality is, however, that I never knew a 2-year-old could have a sense of humor until Buddy came along. This kid cracks me up. He actually makes up "jokes" that are largely rhyming words/sounds in place of sensible words. Or he'll replace words in a song with new words to make silly ideas ("I am a child of cocoa..."). He laughs and laughs about them. That makes us laugh about them, too. Alice has always been such a straight arrow, a literal person, where every word is the absolute truth. We've only just recently begun to joke around with her in simple ways. Buddy, however, plays around with words and meanings. Realities are flexible. It makes him more fun and also a little more difficult to discipline.

Enjoying an "exhibit" at the Spurlock Museum

Speaking of cocoa...

Grinning for Alice while he tickles an unsuspecting Mommy

The most interesting aspect of this personality difference is that it seems to swap when each child has something he/she wants in mind. If Alice wants to do something a certain way or at a certain time, I can usually approve the activity with only slight modifications (i.e. "Let's do that on the kitchen floor instead" or "We'll have more time for that after breakfast"). Alice usually doesn't resist the changes. Buddy, however, is completely consumed with the idea of doing that something a certain way or at a certain time and he is unmovable. A wall. Many, many tears and screaming fits later, I am getting better at asking him very specific questions about his plans and he is coming to accept a few of my modifications (i.e. "What do you mean, 'No, Mommy'? I don't understand. Is there something I can help you with?" or "You can say a prayer after Alice's turn is done" or "Yes, you can scoop your own, but I will hold the container"). It's such an interesting difference. He's able to express himself more clearly every time. Such a relief.

I actually love seeing how this little boy is different from his sister. Just as much as I love seeing how different Alice is from me. It means they have a sense of self. An individual essence. Robert still follows Alice around like a puppy, always asserting, "Buddy bung! Buddy bung!" (translation: 'Buddy come'), but this evening he did something new. Bobby was reading the kids some stories in the living room and I went outside to sweep the patio. Buddy came outside, picked up the second broom, and asked me to close the sliding door behind him, "Close door. Alice stay in. Hee hee hee." Sense of humor, sense of self. Love it.