Mother-Daughter Book Club

We met again tonight with our little Mother-Daughter Book club. There are a few reasons why I continue to do this:

1. I like knowing Alice's friends and seeing her interact with them.

2. The other moms are becoming my friends. Empathy is powerful medicine, man.

3. I'm holding out hope that in five years or so we'll have some seriously awesome conversations about all sorts of topics from the books we read together.

I'm not a big reader, but when I read a good book, I really like to talk about it. I like to hear what other people think about it.

This time, we discussed Ella Enchanted. I wanted to talk about our ability to choose. In the book, Ella is cursed with obedience. She must obey every order given to her. It makes her the perfect student at finishing school, but she's a slave to everyone else's accidental whims (or intentional abuse). I wanted to talk about my obedience. Our obedience. Their obedience. How it feels when we do something because we HAVE to obey. How it's different when we CHOOSE to obey. Maybe discuss techniques we use to subvert direct orders and regain some semblance of control in our lives. Maybe we could talk about other "curses" that restrict our agency...abject poverty, racism, ignorance, fear, sin. I dunno. It just felt like there was a lot more to this idea than a lovely story.

But we didn't talk about agency. We talked about all sorts of things, most of them related to the book, but the girls just couldn't grasp the abstract bits yet. I threw out a question or two about choosing to obey and they responded with, "Of course we obey when we don't want to! All the time."

Oh. Right. They're kids. Well, maybe I was the one not grasping the situation.

But one day, somewhere in the next few years, Alice's brain will develop to the point that she can explore abstractions and symbolism and talk about those ideas. It doesn't mean she WILL talk about them, or WANT to talk about them with me, but it will come :) and if the chooses to share those thoughts with me, I'll be delighted to listen.

Chickens Love Rhubarb

They also decimate my marigolds. I wonder if they use these "poisonous" plants to fight off internal parasites. Crazy.

Voice Recorder

Matthew rediscovered the digital voice recorder yesterday, but this time he could remember how to make and play back recordings consistently. He laughed his head off for 30 minutes recording (and replaying) every potty word he knew.

I caught a couple of them on video, but I have all of them on the recorder if you'd like to have a listen someday ;)

Monday Night Fun

Bobby decided our Monday Night Fun this week would be an Evans Fam Olympics. Alice has been DYING to try this minute-to-win-it game ever since she heard of it...wish granted!

Her mouth is open in case he misses the shaving-cream covered cap. Team Dinosaur Robots started us off.

Team Lightning Dudes takes the win! And the cheese puffs.

We also had a wheelbarrow race, and a stuffy toss game, and several rounds of "Sardines" (one person hides and when you find them you hide with them).

Jealous Robin

There was a red-breasted robin stalking our backyard all afternoon. He/She was especially focused on the bird net surrounding our blueberry bushes that are just beginning to ripen.

Humans scored the food this time! Mr./Mrs. Robin will have to hunt elsewhere.

It's unfortunate, however, that I've just shown Matthew that the berries are edible. Out of the frying pan into the fire!

I peeked in at the Brussels sprouts and snapped this photo:

Marble-sized Brussels sprouts nestled in the leaf joints of their mother plant. Grow big and beautiful, my pretties!

The row cover seems to be doing its job of keeping the cabbage moths out. Something strange happened this week, though. I spied a cabbage moth trapped INSIDE the cover. In my furious confusion to let it out and kill it at the same time, I hit the cover full force and ripped a good-sized hole in the side.

*eye roll*

I can laugh about it now...no worries.

I temporarily patched the hole. The next day, I discovered 2 more trapped moths. One was squished in a fit of rage and the other was let free in a fit of remorse. No trapped moths since. I'm guessing their mom got lucky a few weeks ago and I'm hoping they didn't mate with each other and leave another generation behind.

These Brussels sprouts are sure making me wait a looooooooong time. 

The big garden is good. Lots of green tomatoes. Peppers flowering. Sweet potatoes starting to stretch out their vines. Everything is planted now, so we're entering the watch-water-weed phase.

I should be in bed

Soooooo tired tonight. But happy.

I saw Wonder Woman with Bobby this afternoon. Mixed feelings.

Matthew was snuggling up close to me this afternoon and Robert called him a "cutie pie." Matthew lifted his head so his face was an inch from mine and proclaimed, "Me not a pie."

Got it.

Matthew has this strange habit of resting his hands on my arms while I read to him. At first, I thought it was a fluke...just a convenient place to put one's hands while listening to a story. But time and time again, his hands find their way there. Even when I lift my arm to turn a page, he holds on and readjusts when I put my arm back.

I kissed Matthew on the cheek today and he said, "No kiss me."

"But that's one way I show you that I love you!"

"Oh. Okay. You can kiss me."

"Right now?"

"Yah," and he steps closer to me, giving me his cheek.

Robert walked around the cul-de-sac for 40 minutes today just for a cup of Gatorade. I walked with him for 30 minutes of it. I think he talked the entire time...describing the shape of bushes, logically trying to predict how they will look in a few years, theorizing about how/why that particular baby bird ended up as roadkill, wondering about more "what if" scenarios than I could pay attention to. My mind wandered to the public space planter in the middle of our cul-de-sac as I pondered what it would take to convert it to a "Pollinator Pocket" or a "Monarch Island." Those are local programs that will place your "pocket" on a national registry and give you a fancy sign to post at your garden site. Another time, perhaps.

I got a couple hours in the garden to transplant cucumbers, zucchini, lettuce, spinach, and the ONE and ONLY eggplant that sprouted from 15 seeds. I must have done something terribly wrong. Sheesh.

Then again, how much eggplant do I really need, eh?

Cuke/Zuke Sanctuary

Here's the monstrosity I concocted to protect my cucumbers and zucchini from two very pesky and persistent flying insect pests: the cucumber beetle and the squash beetle.

I don't like the window screen top. I've ordered more row cover fabric to replace it. In the meantime, it looks like this. It's 6 feet tall, 10 feet long, and 4 feet wide.

Also shown in this picture are snapdragons (one PINK one survived?! Really?! Blast it all. The other two aren't pink, thank goodness.), borage (another flower), cosmos (yet another flower), sweet peppers, celery, sweet potatoes, artisan tomatoes, pie pumpkins, flat leaf parsley, columnar basil, red grape tomato, sunflowers, giant zinnias, dill, amish paste tomatoes, geraniums, and Robert's little patch of wheat/oat seeds he gathered from the straw mulch.

All of these plants are still pretty young. You mostly see the mulch from this distance.

Not shown are the Colossal tomatoes, sweet corn, a second type of pie pumpkin, rainbow swiss chard and white potatoes.

Tomorrow, I will move the cukes and zukes into their new home. I am SO curious to see what comes of this garden as the season progresses.

I want to back out...

...of that mini triathlon I signed up for this July. But I'm trying to convince myself to stay on track.

This is a mini triathlon, not a full one. I have two other teammates who will be handling the biking and running portions. I only have to swim. In a lake. For thirty minutes. With a few hundred people.

Here's the thing...I can barely swim 100 yards at a time without needing a break.

Here's the other thing...Freestyle stroke and I have a rocky relationship: I feel like we're friends at the beginning, but somewhere about 50-75 yards, he's playing mean tricks on me. And by 100 yards, he's trying to outright kill me. The mini-tri swim is 500 yards.

Here's one more thing...the thought of having that much lake water in my mouth kinda grosses me out.

Here's the real thing...I'm kinda scared of something this new and different for me.

So that's why I want to back out.

Here's why I want to stay in.

I don't like quitting.

I've already registered and there's no refund.

It's something new and different.

I swam laps for 30 minutes this morning and managed to get in a surprising 800 yards: 200 yards each of freestyle, backstroke, breast stroke, and side stroke. The rules don't say anything about which stroke(s) you have to use.

So, I guess I'll stay in this time. I won't however, keep pressuring my other friends to do a mini-tri with me in September. I signed up for this July one as a "practice run" for the one in September, but now I'm thinking that one is probably enough for me :)

Summer Groove and B.O.

Dare I say it? I think we've finally adapted to the summer groove...3.5 weeks in. That's pretty normal for us. It takes time to shift expectations/schedules juuuuuust so...a balancing act every day, but now we're hitting it more often than missing it.

Whew.

And Matthew is down to only 2 bathroom accidents a week :)

It didn't kill me to take them all to the grocery store. It was almost fun.

And I got a solid 4 hours in the garden(s) today transplanting, direct seeding, weeding, watering, and building protective structures. Bobby even helped me move my 6-foot-tall cuke/zuke sanctuary to the big garden. Pictures to come later *squeeeeeeeee*!

And the kids loaded up on library books today, so the bickering was way down and the lounging around in utter silence was way up...punctuated by periodic bursts of laughter. It takes great self-control to visit the library only once a week ;)

*************

I was in James' room helping him with something and he asks me, "What is that smell?!" I turn around and he's got his arm up in the air and his nose in his naked armpit.  I think he was changing out of pajamas.

"What smell?" I ask.

"This one. Smell it!"

I take a whiff of his armpit 'cuz a 4-year-old can't possibly have B.O.. I'm wrong. It's the slightest hint, but there it is.

"Dude, that's B.O.. It's normal." I try not to sound surprised or impressed. I'm totally surprised and impressed.

"Oh, okay."

Produce Sales

Did I mention that this garden thing makes me really, really happy?

Now it makes my kids happy, too...I've hired them to run an "outlet store" for our extra produce.

It looks a little like this:
I plan the garden
I plant the garden
I tend the garden
Alice takes pictures of the produce we'll likely have too much of at the end of the week
She posts the pictures to a blog
We decide on prices together
We send an email to friends and neighbors
Friends and neighbors make orders
The kids harvest produce for the orders
The kids prep the produce for the orders
I drive/walk the kids to customers' houses
The kids deliver the produce and handle the money

It's worked for two weeks so far. We'll see how they feel about things as the summer heat and humidity settle in.

Making a delivery this morning with the help of a friend visiting from Ohio.

Feeling Weary

Matthew's been getting up at 5:30 this week. The kids have been in and out of my room at night, too. I've gone to bed on time or early every night, but Bobby's out of town this week, so I'm "on call" 24-7. It's starting to wear me down :(

My garden makes me so happy! Harvesting only 90sqft of peas today is taking hours, though...interruptions, squabbles, snacks, potty needs, chickens pecking Matthew in the eye. For real?! Yes, for real. Technically, the hen pecked by his eye, but he reacted like she had torn off his face. I'm feeling kinda sub-human-tired today, so I may have sided with the chicken at first. I came to my senses and the chickens got an immediate time-out. Matthew wouldn't let me hold/comfort him because my hands were dirty from ripping out pea plants :(

So, I'm skipping the Relief Society activity tonight. I need some serious down time and an early bedtime.

*YAWN*

Cookies

I don't remember who's idea it was, but the bigger kids ended up making chocolate chunk mega sprinkle cookies the other day. They did just about everything but the oven bits (both kids have been burned before and they're a little oven-shy these days). They even cleaned up!

One scooped dough, one rolled it in sprinkles, and the last one placed it on the pan.

I'm pretty sure it was Robert's idea, now that I see this picture. He was clearly the one in charge. Pretty tasty cookies, even if they were half sprinkles ;)

Duets

Alice had a friend over today and at one point they just sat down at the piano. Alice pulled out a little melody book that she could sight read and her friend sang as they went along...

Lots of fumbling, stopping, and starting over, but they did it. It made me smile.

A couple weeks ago, Alice tried sight reading some of Robert's Suzuki method book. It's not really sight reading, since she's heard the pieces a thousand times, but it was the first time she had tried to play them herself. I couldn't resist the urge to slide onto the bench beside her and turn them into duets. It was fun to make music together, even with all the fumbling, stopping, and starting over. That's part of the fun :) I kinda like this growing up thing.

James Riding a Pedal Bike!

Reluctant to try it, but thrilled when he finally did: James can now ride a pedal bike on his own! This video was taken minutes after he mounted the bike for the first time. I love the last few seconds when he stop-falls onto the driveway and jumps up with, "Again! Again! Again!"

A balance bike makes learning to ride a regular bike SO much easier! Tons. The balance bike now falls to Matthew, who is simultaneously excited and scared to be on wheels. He hasn't quite figured it out yet, as you can see by his worried expression (and his constant, "Mommy, I stuck!" complaint in the video background). That's okay. James hated his first day on the balance bike, too. He refused to ride it the whole first summer, actually, but here we are. Yay!

Thanks to Bobby

I woke up at 5:40 this morning, snuck out of the house while everyone else was sleeping, got my gardening tools, and headed out to the big garden all by myself.

I got to work in peace and complete focus. No one asked anything from me. No one distracted or interrupted me. I barely spoke four words.

Two hours later, I returned home feeling refreshed, happy, satisfied, and energized for the rest of the day.

This little miracle was made possible by 1) kids getting older and 2) Bobby's brilliant "sleep in day" swap idea. Our kids all sleep through the night (mostly), and none of them are nursing, and two of them are old enough to get their own breakfast and help the littles with minor things, so there's something of a regular, predictable morning routine that either one of us adults can easily manage on our own. The other adult gets to "sleep in." I have LOVED my "off days" and stopped begrudging my "on days."

Every night and every day used to be an "on day." Ugh.

The last week or so, I've been using my "off days" to work in the big garden. It means I don't get to sleep in, but the benefits have far outweighed the drawbacks. So far. And here's how I can prove it:

This morning, James came in and woke me up at 4:10. It was my "off day" so I redirected him to Bobby's side of the bed. James immediately lost interest and went back to his room. I had a fitful sleep after that, though, knowing I would be getting up soon to go to the big garden. My dream took me to a beautiful castle resort where we were visiting and vacationing with several people I love to hang out with. It was awesome! Until I looked at the clock in my dream and realized that I had MISSED my two hours in the garden. I was so, so disappointed, then so, so happy to wake up at 5:40 and get out to the garden after all!

What a relief and joy it is to have that time in the big garden all to my self.

Thanks, Bobby!

Guess what?

I grew CABBAGE! Real cabbage. Really real real cabbage.

I see it in the store all the time, but watching it go from seed to this is...is...mind-blowing.

I think it's stunning. Absolute beauty. Can you believe the plant grew this way all by itself?

Once I got the plants trimmed down a bit, the three mini heads weighed in at 1, 1, and 1.25 pounds. So petite! 

Alice didn't want to be in the picture. I didn't want a picture of only veggies. We kinda compromised on this shot.

This was a "mini" variety of cabbage that supposedly makes 3# heads. Maybe I harvested too soon? There are several more still in the ground that I'll let go a little longer. Weeeeeeeeeee!

The cauliflower in the middle is way, way, way, smaller than the seed packet promised. I had to study a lot to figure out when a cauliflower was ripe and this was definitely ripe. Just stunted. My research indicates cauliflower can be a little fussy about temperature. There are three more cauliflower plants in the ground that aren't ripe yet. Fingers crossed.

Crucifers

Cabbages still not quite ready, but those are beautiful plants to behold. My absolute favorite right now.

Teeny little cauliflower heads popping up.

Brussels Sprouts the size of BBs.

This might actually work. This whole gardening thing might actually work this year. Unbelievable. 

Even the 2-year-old can climb

Not to be left behind, Matthew has managed to scale the climbing bush this high. Now to convince him that he can get DOWN by himself, too:

James yells to me from the backyard, "Mooooooom! Matthew's stuck...again."

Strawberries!

It's strawberry season at our house and I swear they have never been this delicious before.

Teeny and bursting with flavor! And the strawberries are pretty good, too ;)

It's like I won the freakishly-delicious-strawberry lottery. And none of the varmints got them first! One of the berries was a scrumptious mouthful of fresh strawberry jam. I yelled out in surprise. Maybe it was a scream. And I may have fainted for a moment. Anyway, Robert looked at me funny and handed over 2 of his own berries just to see me lose it again.

Sheesh. What are these kids gonna remember about me?!

But all this deliciousness comes at a cost. An unknown cost. These are new strawberry plants and I was "supposed" to remove all the flower buds so the plants could focus on growing big and getting strong for the crop of their lifetime NEXT year. I was too lazy/busy/curious/greedy this time to follow the rules. Whoops. We shall see what happens next year, shan't we?

In other garden news, Robert has almost figured out how to water the plants with his thumb over the end of a hose. That's very, very good. Veeeeeeeery good...for me (evil laughter).

Our spring crop of mini cabbages is almost ready. They're about the size of croquet balls. James likes to go out there and measure the heads by squeezing them. He doesn't really eat cabbage, but he's dying to harvest it. He's always the first one at my side when I've got a harvesting knife in-hand. 

Messes

I make many messes throughout the day. I clean up plenty of messes, too: cooking messes, laundry messes, paper messes, gardening messes, kids' messes, bathroom messes. What I mean by "mess" is any activity that takes something from its place and puts it somewhere else. Cleaning up that mess is the act of putting all the somethings back where they belong or creating places for the new things created.

By this definition, there are often several messes being made and cleaned up at the same time. Especially during the summer when there are 5 of us "mess" makers sharing time and space.

Well, a week or two ago I ended up taking all of the kids with me to the Landscape Recycling Center for more compost. Why? I don't know. But I had to. I couldn't fold the back seats down like usual, so I had to get creative (and a little risky) with all those 5-gallon buckets filled to the brim with compost. I stacked several on top of each other. It was a short trip home. I took turns carefully. We arrived in terrific shape. Well, some sort of urgent "mess" happened when we got home ("Me gotta use uh potty!" or "I'm starving" or whatever) and I didn't end up taking out the compost right away. The next morning, I unloaded some of it at the big garden, but kids were not cooperating and I didn't get a chance to unload all of it. I frankly forgot it was there until the next day when we were rushing to get somewhere on time. Piano lessons? Can't remember. I took a turn a little too fast and 3 buckets took a head-over-heels spill into the area behind the rear seats.

Huge, huge mess.

Luckily, I had put down a canvas tarp underneath the buckets, so most of the compost missed the carpet. Whew.

Messes that result from some incompetence on my part are especially noxious to me. I loathe to clean them up. I avoid them. I often allow other "messes" to take my time and attention away from such matters, especially since this mess was mostly contained on a canvas tarp. If it had landed directly on the carpet, I might have done something sooner. But, well, I was being a dork and letting it sit there.

For a week. Or two.

I got around to cleaning it up this morning. As I had predicted, most of the compost was contained on the tarp and all I had to do was wrap it up and lift it out carefully. The vacuum took care of the stray spills. But! And this is a big but. The compost had been a little moist. Dampness had soaked through the canvas into the carpet where I could now see several wheat or oat seeds (from the straw I sometimes haul back there) had sprouted and taken root...into the carpet.

Ack! Agape and ashamed, I weeded my car floor.

Will I be more responsible next time and clean up my embarrassing, incompetence-generated messes sooner? One would hope. Time will tell.

Robert and James in our "Climbing Bush" this week.

Gardening Peace

I bribed James with candy to go to a play date so I could work in the garden unencumbered.

It was a beautiful thing.

And a good deal on both sides.

Thanks to my friend for offering to take all four kids for a couple hours. It turns out Alice and Robert wanted to stay home, catch up on chores, and watch a computer turn. They are old enough (and compatible enough) that I was comfortable leaving them home together while I worked at the big garden a block away. The two littles got to play at my friends' house.

I got to prep the soil for and plant giant, edible sunflowers.

I got to prep the soil for and plant tiny blue flower seeds that attract pollinators (aka borage).

I got to check on my vigorous, robust, and happy little tomato plants thriving in the full sun and rich soil. That fungus I was fighting earlier has almost entirely vanished. Some of the plants' recovery might have come from the treatment I gave them, but I'm betting most of it came from getting the environment they needed. Plants, like people, get sick easily when they're under stress or malnourished. Now these little babies are happy and strong and they smell wonderful. Some are even starting to bloom.

Speaking of smelly tomatoes: Just the other day, I was prepping some tomatoes for dinner. They were some of those on-the-vine tomatoes. James walks by and sniffs, "Mmm, I love that smell." Then he sticks his nose into the bag of tomatoes on-the-vine and inhales deeply.

He said, "Take a picture of me making this face." Done.

I harvested three "heads" of green leaf lettuce this morning. Not bitter. That's the first time I've ever grown sweet lettuce. Ever.

That said, there's this mind block I still have to overcome when it comes to eating food I grow...I still don't entirely trust it. Like it's dirty or not as tasty or something. The kids kinda have it, too. They were willing to try the homegrown carrots, but they didn't really want them to be served as the vegetable at dinner. Alice was the same this morning about the potential for having homegrown lettuce at dinner. She raised an eyebrow and asked in her most diplomatic 10-year-old way, "Can salad be one of the veggie options at dinner tonight instead of the only veggie option?"

I ate a salad for lunch featuring this homegrown leaf lettuce (Black Seeded Simpson) and I was so scared it would taste bad that I drowned it with shredded carrots, smoked turkey, provolone, tomatoes, and lots of Ranch dressing. I don't think I actually tasted the lettuce at all. Which is a good thing, right? Sheesh, Susan. I kinda felt this way when our chickens first started laying eggs...wondering if they were actually safe to eat. Now I don't think twice about it. So, maybe eating fresh garden produce is just something I need to practice :)

Welcome to the ClubHouse

Erin left this afternoon and we're still in mourning :( but trying to move on courageously.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is the fruit of our labors this holiday weekend:

Just about done. Erin and the kids are painting inside.

Erin arrived Friday night and we (mostly Bobby) worked pretty much all day Saturday, Monday (Memorial Day), Tuesday, and Wednesday. It was a labor of love and time and sweat. The instruction manual said it should take two adults something like 8 hours to assemble. Ha! Every time we would finish a section, we'd think, "Whew, okay, that was the hardest part. The rest should be easier." And we'd be wrong every time ;)

But it's beautiful and totally worth it. The kids are thrilled, I'm thrilled, and Bobby's thrilled never to do that again, thank you very much. More pictures:

Two walls up

All four walls, roof trusses, and the beginning of a real roof!

James and Matthew chillin' by the grill on Memorial Day.

Cherry Cusma. It's a Romanian dessert well worth the effort. Mmmmmmm.

A view inside! Matthew is covering his ears because Bobby is still shingling the roof and it's really, really loud in there. We love the loft!

Decorating the inside. Erin and I took all day to prime and paint the inside. Then the kids got to decorate it themselves. Alice was feeling a little sad that Erin would be leaving the next day, so her decorations kinda took a "shrine" slant. There are outright declarations as you see here and other references to various inside jokes they've collected over the years.

Even Matthew got into it. Love that little lefty!

And James went through two other painting outfits before this one. He got paint on his first set, which was totally fine. But then he changed his clothes and nobody noticed until he already got paint on himself again. And another set. Pbbbbsh.

We still have some finishing touches we'd like to do: finish painting the outside, install the shutters and window boxes, put some sort of water-resistant flooring in (stick-on vinyl tiles?), and then eventually create flower beds around it so it's incorporated into the general backyard design. Maybe a path up to the front door? But not for a while.

We're gonna take a breather. Whew!