The kids had (separate) music/dance assemblies at school today. I would have skipped them, as always, with two littles in tow, but Alice and Robert were really hoping to see me there. Big, semi-public things like these where I'll run into tons of people I half-sorta-know...ack!
It turned out pretty well in the end. I decided to say hi to the parents I recognized and it didn't kill me. I also smiled and waved at a mom I would like to get to know better and she asked if she could sit by me. We made conversation. It was pretty darn easy this time. Know why? Because we were talking about our kids. I guess I can make small talk about my kids or another person's kids. That's easy. I am genuinely interested in that topic right now. Or maybe it's because I genuinely cared about getting to know her. Either way, I had a good time.
Interesting. Maybe that's one reason I hate small talk...I never ask about stuff I'm genuinely interested in, or I don't genuinely care about the person I'm talking to. Small talk feels like a 5-minute formality where I won't remember anything they said and I won't give them any genuine answers...because how many people really share or care about how things are actually going?
Friday, February 12, 2016
Wednesday, February 10, 2016
Lent at Work
My Lenten goal was put to the test today. I had offered to give someone's children a ride, but they hadn't gotten back to me. I don't know this person very well, but I know them well enough that they were probably too swamped with living life to respond to me in time. And I knew their kids were really looking forward to this event.
Normally, I would have just gone without them.
This time, because I'm working on this, I actually walked up to their front door and knocked. Ack! Turns out, they were really glad I did. Everything turned out fine for everyone involved.
Whew.
Normally, I would have just gone without them.
This time, because I'm working on this, I actually walked up to their front door and knocked. Ack! Turns out, they were really glad I did. Everything turned out fine for everyone involved.
Whew.
Monday, February 8, 2016
Lent
The custom of Lent varies broadly between Christian sects, but I appreciate the overarching description that wikipedia gives:
There are traditionally forty days in Lent which are marked by fasting, both from foods and festivities, and by other acts of penance. The three traditional practices to be taken up with renewed vigour during Lent are prayer (justice towards God), fasting (justice towards self), and almsgiving (justice towards neighbour).
However, in modern times, observers give up an action of theirs considered to be a vice, add something that is considered to be able to bring them closer to God, and often give the time or money spent doing that to charitable purposes or organizations.
I first heard about Lent from a Catholic friend who adored it as a season to prepare for Easter. Then I brushed into it again with an atheist co-worker who found it a fine time to give in to all his vices...just to be contrary :) Finally, I read an article on modern observances of Lent and was struck by one pastor's words that most people see it as a time to sacrifice something for a while, but it should really be used to make us better people forever. What a notion! I loved the idea that I could focus on one of my sins or weaknesses for 46 days and truly repent/overcome/conquer and improve myself!
So that's why I observe Lent.
Last year, I tackled my addiction to treats. It took 46 days of fasting from treats to show me how and why I needed them so badly. Now, I'm better at moderating and indulging periodically like a normal person. Not perfect. Never will be. But now these are conscious choices and I don't feel so out of control anymore.
This year is a tough one. Been thinking about it a lot. There is something I struggle with that I wish and wish and wish I could improve almost every day: interactions with people I don't know well.
So, it's time to face the awkwardness. I don't expect to change into an extrovert over night...or ever...I just want to find a more comfortable expectation for myself.
That's my focus from Wednesday (Ash Wednesday) to Easter Sunday. I'm still debating how best to approach it, but I will probably set specific goals/behaviors for myself (e.g. say hello to everyone I pass on the sidewalk? chit chat with grocery store cashiers? invite three new people to do something social with me? read a self-help book on making conversation?).
Still have 2 days to figure that out :)
There are traditionally forty days in Lent which are marked by fasting, both from foods and festivities, and by other acts of penance. The three traditional practices to be taken up with renewed vigour during Lent are prayer (justice towards God), fasting (justice towards self), and almsgiving (justice towards neighbour).
However, in modern times, observers give up an action of theirs considered to be a vice, add something that is considered to be able to bring them closer to God, and often give the time or money spent doing that to charitable purposes or organizations.
I first heard about Lent from a Catholic friend who adored it as a season to prepare for Easter. Then I brushed into it again with an atheist co-worker who found it a fine time to give in to all his vices...just to be contrary :) Finally, I read an article on modern observances of Lent and was struck by one pastor's words that most people see it as a time to sacrifice something for a while, but it should really be used to make us better people forever. What a notion! I loved the idea that I could focus on one of my sins or weaknesses for 46 days and truly repent/overcome/conquer and improve myself!
So that's why I observe Lent.
Last year, I tackled my addiction to treats. It took 46 days of fasting from treats to show me how and why I needed them so badly. Now, I'm better at moderating and indulging periodically like a normal person. Not perfect. Never will be. But now these are conscious choices and I don't feel so out of control anymore.
This year is a tough one. Been thinking about it a lot. There is something I struggle with that I wish and wish and wish I could improve almost every day: interactions with people I don't know well.
- I have a hard time making eye contact with strangers I pass on the sidewalk.
- If I see someone I recognize (but don't really know), I duck out or busy myself with something and pretend I don't see them.
- I never introduce myself to new people at church or work functions or moms groups or anywhere.
- I don't invite people to do stuff with me, even if I really, really, really want to get to know them better.
So, it's time to face the awkwardness. I don't expect to change into an extrovert over night...or ever...I just want to find a more comfortable expectation for myself.
That's my focus from Wednesday (Ash Wednesday) to Easter Sunday. I'm still debating how best to approach it, but I will probably set specific goals/behaviors for myself (e.g. say hello to everyone I pass on the sidewalk? chit chat with grocery store cashiers? invite three new people to do something social with me? read a self-help book on making conversation?).
Still have 2 days to figure that out :)
Hideousness
Had a dream last night that I was unexpectedly pregnant. Cried for two days straight. When I woke up, the idea of having another kid did not bring me to tears, but I was relieved not to be in that situation :) My life is full. Filled to the tippy top with people I love and the mess that comes with knitting our lives together.
We had a stimulating dinner conversation the other day that led to this photo shoot. Can't remember what we talked about...I think it had to do with nose squishiness:
We had a stimulating dinner conversation the other day that led to this photo shoot. Can't remember what we talked about...I think it had to do with nose squishiness:
Saturday, February 6, 2016
Rock Climbing!
So, I joined a gym.
*gasp*
It's SO not like me, I know. Crazy, right?
Well, it's not just any gym, it's the YMCA. A really, really neat YMCA.
With a 30' climbing wall:
Bobby took the kids climbing today while I traveled to the temple. He tells me 30 minutes was just enough time because Alice's arms were getting tired (she rang the bell three times!) and it took James 20 minutes to finally warm up to the idea of attempting it. Robert was climbing up and down the whole time, but was afraid to be up so high alone. He finally got to the top when one of the instructors was climbing next to him.
*gasp*
It's SO not like me, I know. Crazy, right?
Well, it's not just any gym, it's the YMCA. A really, really neat YMCA.
With a 30' climbing wall:
Bobby took the kids climbing today while I traveled to the temple. He tells me 30 minutes was just enough time because Alice's arms were getting tired (she rang the bell three times!) and it took James 20 minutes to finally warm up to the idea of attempting it. Robert was climbing up and down the whole time, but was afraid to be up so high alone. He finally got to the top when one of the instructors was climbing next to him.
 |
| Spider girl! She's so strong. Robert's on the right with an instructor. |
 |
| Still. Not. Sure. Lucky for us, the instructors are used to working with kids as young as 2 years old and are willing to start at the very, very basics. |
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