Like Having Two

Since my sister moved to town, Alice and Robert have been spending a couple afternoons a week at her house. They just walk/bike to her place after school and stay until dinner time. This week, I finally got used to it and discovered one final benefit that I hadn't predicted.

Anticipated benefits:

I think it's great for the big kids to have some time with another loving adult who cares for them and wants to be part of their life.

I love how this arrangement gives us practice with independence and time management. Both for the kids and as an adult.

I figure it's been great for Erin, too, since she suggested it and has allowed it to continue.


Unanticipated benefits:

James and Matthew get more time and attention from me.

I get more time and attention from Matthew and James.

I feel like I only have two kids again. With only two kids in a short age range, I can be a little more spontaneous. I can tailor activities and errands to maximize our time together. Yesterday is a great example of this.

Yesterday, a part arrived in the mail that would allow me to pull the kid trailer behind my new road bike. It was 2:30pm. Normally, that close to the time when Alice and Robert would be coming home from school, we would be locked down at home waiting. When Alice and Robert arrived, we'd have to get everyone a snack, ask about homework and music practice, and decompress after a hard day at school. The kids would fight a little, get involved in a game outside or a book inside. If I wanted to try out the new trailer attachment, we'd have to negotiate with four kids how long of a bike ride and where and who was going and who would lead. I would worry about three kids in the road with me, especially James who doesn't have ANY experience on a bike ride. To save energy and sanity, I would have put it off or settled on the cul-de-sac being enough practice. And everything would have been fine. That's just how my life is these days.

BUT!

This time, with dinner in the crock pot and the big kids at Erin's, we had all afternoon ahead of us! No need to snack or decompress or negotiate anything. James loved the idea of a bike ride. Matthew did too. I threw out a couple destination ideas and they cheered for the first one. We rode out there. Still had energy, so we rode to the next one. Played for a while. Then the next one. Only two kids! Fewer voices and relationships to navigate. Only one kid on the road to worry about. Played and played and biked until it was time to go home for dinner.

That was lovely. James felt like such a big kid. We all came home happier for the experience. I could use more afternoons like that.

Totally loves his bike, this one.

Next week is the last week of school. I hope our summer schedule includes afternoons like these, but summer comes with an infinite number of variables. Add that to the fact that I never seem to feel as spontaneous and energetic with four kids as I do with two, and the chances fall to near zero :(

I remain hopeful, however, that this summer will be an exciting one. I feel a burst of firsts coming on ;)