Waiting for the mailman...

...he's got a letter for me. It should be coming soon. It's coming from Kansas. From a lady with a very midwestern accent who thought "digital image" was a word I made up. If I'm lucky, she'll be mailing me two death certificates. If I'm really, really, lucky, then the people who filled out those death certificates in 1929 and 1940 were well-versed in the decedents' life history and happy to fill in every single blank on the form 100% accurately. And if my wildest dreams come true, there will be a family picture and a lengthy, fact-filled obituary attached to each one!

I'm also waiting for a microfilm from the Family History Library in Salt Lake City. It's less certain what I will find on the film, but maybe, just maybe, I can sort out part of another ancestor's marriage and divorce history. "Ida" was a very common name in Kansas in the 1880s. Right now, a few different people seem to think she married and divorced a series of men in quick succession, finally having children with the 3rd or 4th spouse and then losing those children to social services. I can only confirm that she lived with her parents in Kansas until she was 20, then died 60 years later in Los Angeles County, California, married to a man with the last name of "Panick." Forty years is quite a gap.

And I'm waiting to hear news on my friend. She's delivering the first baby in Peek-A-Boo's birth cohort (there are 5 women in my church congregation expecting babies from October to February. Peek-A-Boo is right in the middle). Last night, as I was falling asleep with abdominal cramping, an achy pelvis, and heartburn, I imagined Peek-A-Boo all swaddled in a hospital bassinet next to my hospital bed. It seemed like a blissful release. I allowed myself to linger on it for just a moment.

I feel ready and unready for Peek-A-Boo's arrival in 6-7 weeks. I feel like I know what I'm getting in to (ready!), but I'm experienced enough to know that I'm getting into chaos (unready!). So, I prepare what I can, knowing that I don't know what exactly to prepare for. And my dear, dear James is the biggest wild card of all. I'm still figuring him out and he's still changing/growing/experimenting as we go...

This week, he's had a few run-ins with playmates. They race to a desired toy, tussle over it, and declare a victor. James' feelings get hurt SO easily that the playmate need only push or hit or grab James' shirt a little roughly to send him bawling to the floor. Several times, he has cried longer over an injustice than actual physical harm, even when he dealt out a few injustices himself in the tussle.

James trusts me when I say "I'll be right back" or "If this, then that." He can be very, very patient at times. On the other hand, a raised voice or rough command from a sibling sends him into "desperate panic" mode and he'll fight tooth and nail for the slightest advantage. I've been working with Buddy on this. Buddy always anticipates negative action from James, so he yells at James to stand back or get off or go away before James has even had time to assess the play situation. This triggers some sort of fight reflex in James who instantly attacks Robert or whatever he's playing with. Ugh. When I manage to intervene early enough, reminding Robert that a kinder voice seems to get better results with James, Robert softens his approach and James will do anything Robert asks him to do. Anything. Like a light switch turned on. This has happened only a few times so far, but Buddy initiated it himself the last time and came to tell me how much better it worked than a grumpy voice. Whew.

So, whatever happens once Peek-A-Boo arrives, let's all use kind voices :)