Alice is 14!!

Happy Magical Birthday, Alice! 14 years old on the 14th. You've been looking forward to this birthday for a long time, ever since James turned 3 years old on the 3rd and got three wishes. You were thinking, planning, wondering what you could possibly wish for on your 14th birthday. 

Well, you have decided on two wishes for sure:

1) A Halloween-trick-or-treat-sized load of GOOD candy

2) A Marvel-movie marathon (3 films in a row during a girl's night at Erin's house)

You saved the third wish for another time...interesting...

This birthday was special in a couple of ways besides the three wishes thing: 1) it commemorated a year of Covid-19 lockdowns, and 2) you put off the party a little to ensure Erin's vaccinations were done and she could come eat and play with us without everyone having to wear masks. That was the first time I had seen the bottom half of Erin's face in 2 months. 

I've got to confess, Alice, you spend an awful lot of age-appropriate time in your room these days, so I don't know you so well as I used to. It's a good thing you're still pretty open about your thoughts and feelings. I like it when you tell me about your vivid dreams. I like that the first thing you do when you come out of your room is give me a hug. And I like that the last thing you do before returning to your room is give me a hug. Dad and I both look forward to the hugs and "good night"s we get from you after the boys are in bed and you've just taken a shower. It's quiet and calm. You get a drink of water and then give us hugs before heading to bed. That's nice.

I am so, so relieved that your anxiety is better controlled these days. You seem happier. 

You seem more teenagery now that you're 14. You even slept in until 9:30am once. That was crazy late for you! Your sense of self is strengthening, your humor is more complex, and there are layers of meaning in your words and actions. Your teachers gush about you as an independent and confident leader who takes great strength from her faith. They admire your responsibility and your work ethic. They find you a delightful person with lots to contribute to the discussion. Your Spanish teacher especially loves your creative stories and thinks you will end up in Hollywood writing movie scripts. I'm not making this up. This is what they told me at Parent-Teacher conferences just last week :)

With all your outward confidence and burgeoning identity, I sometimes forget how vulnerable you feel inside. Robert's attempts at joking around with you often go too far or cross a line. It's hard to bounce back from those things. But you do. Somehow, after some time, you forgive and move on. That's an admirable trait. Robert doesn't even know how good he's got it. He just follows you around like a puppy, desperate for your attention, because you're just so darn cool. 

And you adore Matthew. He's your little spider monkey. You've even taken over giving him baths (which Dad and I appreciate to no end, by the way). You guys have a lot in common, despite your differences in age and experience. You both internalize rules and want to keep them. You both have a sensitive nature that doesn't tolerate much violence or tension. Well, you used to. You've grown up a lot in that area, too. You can read books and watch movies that used to scare you for weeks. But you remember the fear that used to be there and can empathize with Matthew in powerful ways. You and Matthew both enjoy your friends very much. You need people in ways Robert and James don't really understand. 

I love that you still share girl things with me. It's just you and me in this house full of boys. 

I'm a little jealous that you can slip off to your room any time and leave the chaos behind, but you make up for that in the times you see a need and jump in to help before anyone asks. You're capable of making dinner, and you do it when I need it. You're capable of de-fusing a volatile situation brewing between the boys, and you do it. You're a warm, intuitive influence that enriches our lives and glues us together as a family. These are only a few of the gifts you routinely contribute to our family.

You're curious and intelligent. Logical. Surprisingly strong in all the ways you need to be in the moment. Your faith and testimony inspire me. And your siblings. 

We're very fortunate to have you, Alice. All 14 years of you so far :)

A thank-you hug for Matthew. He gave you a card that he wrote and illustrated all by himself in your favorite colors.

Dark chocolate covered cherries in your "Halloween" candy load.