Post-op Approval

I had my post-op appointment on Monday. The doc who performed the c-section was with a laboring patient, so they managed to squeeze me in to see the midwife on-call who happened to be Vanessa. She checked out my incision and said I could rip off the surgical tape any time I was ready (it wasn't as painful as I had feared). I've got a little more healing to do (cramping inside and itching outside), but I'm off the pain meds altogether and able to get around better. I asked Vanessa if I was approved to drive and she uttered one of the most profound and empowering statements I've ever heard:

Without a hint of sarcasm, she simply said, "Feel free to act like a normal person."

I laughed at that in the moment, focusing on the verb "act"...yup, it takes serious acting to make me look normal.

It was when I was heading home that I thought about it more. She had actually given me permission to stop seeing myself as fragile, broken, different, and in need. And THAT is an empowering string of words.

From that moment on, I actually stood up a little taller. The pain bothered me less. I wasn't afraid of bursting at the seams any moment. I stopped giving myself excuses to bow out of difficult situations (discipline stuff with the kids at home, mostly). I was healed because I had permission to be healed.

This wasn't the first time I've felt something so profound and meaningful from the midwives' advice. It's happened twice before. Once when I was pregnant with Robert (Vanessa), and the next when in labor with him (Kathy Easter).